All That Matters
by lovethebroken
Summary: <html><head></head>Ava didn't always want to be a hunter, but it was her fate. With her family gone, her reckless attitude spirals out of control. When she meets two brothers that seem to care about her-she'll learn that family can mean more than blood.DEAN/OFC SAM/OFC AU</html>
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural or the boys and I'm in no way affiliated with the show.**

**Hope You Enjoy.**

**=)**

**AU Season 6 **

**AN: ****SPOILER****: **

Sam has his soul.

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Being a hunter wasn't always the first thing that came to mind when people would ask about my future. My passion wasn't always keeping up with what new gun or new folklore book was out in stores. My obsessions didn't always revolve around how much ammo we had or the thought that the first aid kit needed to be fully stalked _all the time_. No. Believe it or not- I was the head cheerleader at my high school. The yearbook club was my life. I was dating the all-state running back. My grades were pristine. I had already applied and was accepted into NYU. As far as I was concerned, I was leaving the big state of Texas just a week after graduation.

The sad and fatal reality though, I knew how to disassemble, reassemble, load, and shoot a 9MM in under 30 seconds. I was fully aware of how to kill a vampire…even though…they don't 'exist' by natures laws. I never left the house unarmed. My entire family had been hunters of the supernatural. 'Pests' are what my dad used to call them. I had been on dozens and dozens of hunts by the time I was sixteen and I had no intention of continuing this life style. I wanted to be married and to have children- just to be free of this madness.

I hissed as my so-called 'doctor' stuck the needle that he was using to stitch me up with a little _too_ deep, "God, Bobby…are you trying to kill me?"

"Not anymore than you try to kill yourself," he grumbled. He always voiced his opinion to me regardless of feeling. He thought I had a death wish to join my family soon. I watched his brow fury in concentration as I finally felt the pain pill he had given me kick in. My body felt as if it were melting into the desk he had me laid on. My side was cut mid stomach to my bottom left rib. It was just a mere flesh wound by my late father's standards. By my standards, I should have gone to the ER. It would have been less painful…for Bobby.

"You're so much like Aaron," he mumbled as he continued. The sweat on his brow was beading-threatening to fall. My eyes blurred at the mention of my brother's name. "Always coming to me, asking me to stitch him up. Ya think you would have learned from him."

I sucked in a breath, not from the stitching, but the ache that was in my chest, "I did learn from him."

He glanced at me with sadness before jerking his head away at the knock on the front door, "Shit."

"Hot date?" I tried to joke over the sinking feeling of the drugs. 'Stay' he mumbled as he walked off into the foyer. I closed my eyes thinking 'where in the hell am I going to go?'

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I opened my eyes to voices. Where and who, I had not a clue. I moved slightly and moaned. I was on Bobby's couch now covered up with an old blue blanket that was more than musty. Guess I wasn't good enough for the good stuff. I smirked and shoved it away. I sat up gently and rubbed my face. I needed a shower. The blood from the cut above my eye was still caked to my face and parts of hair. He had also bandaged up my left arm that held my 'defensive' wounds. I stood slowly and made my way to the kitchen. I could hear three voices including Bobby's. I didn't recognize the other two.

"We didn't save her."

"But you did kill it?" – Bobby.

"Yeah…all of these folklore and urban legends are coming true. I don't…we can't fight this Bobby. Hell, I'm not even sure what weapons to use have the time."

"Not like we can tell it to hold still while we throw everything we've got at it." Another voice chimed in quickly.

"We'll figure it out as we go son." –Bobby.

Son? I wasn't even aware Bobby had children. In all the years of knowing Bobby he had never once mentioned family of any kind…besides his late wife.

I choose that moment to step through the door. They all swung their heads to me, surprised. I held my injured side as I leaned against the doorframe, "Folklore and Urban Legends stem from true events…fairytale's are even recorded to often be true."

The smaller of the two strangers straightened as he curled his fingers around his beer, "Great."

Bobby sighed at this. Leave it to the history buff to ruin the '_men's_ _conversation_'.

"Are you feeling better?" I shifted my eyes toward the biggest stranger. His brown hair reached just below his ears. In that second I decided he needed a haircut.

"I'll live."

Bobby snorted as he stood up heading toward the coffee. I guess he was still angry with me, "Thank Sam. He finished your stitching. He's much better and smoother than I am."

I left a soft smile grace my lips as I gave a nod, "Thank you. I owe you one."

"Not necessary," he said, his hazel sparkling at me. I had to admit he was handsome for a hunter. You don't find many young hunters these days. Bobby shoved a cup of black coffee and another pain pill toward me. I took them, gratefully.

"Sam, Dean, Ava…Ava, Dean, Sam," I loved how Bobby introduced people. It was like he was stating roll call. Sam smiled. Dean had yet to break the solemn look on his face, but he gave a slight nod. Maybe he wasn't fond of female hunters. That wasn't unusual in this 'business.'

"Pleasure. I'm going to take a shower Bobby and then I'm lying down." I backed out the door carefully with my coffee. "Hold my calls." I added with a smile as I fled down the hallway. I did, however, hear Sam chuckle. This made my heart flutter. Odd, I thought it had died years ago.

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_All I could hear was my heart pounding away in my ears. My feet were hitting the ground hard-hard enough for my feet to ache. Branches were hitting me in the face. I could feel the blood running down my face in hot trails tickling my chin before running down my neck. Where could I hide when I basically had a pork chop tied to my neck? I could hear __**it**__ hissing through the dark. It was at a constant move- tracking me I assumed. I had dropped my flashlight about a quarter of a mile back. Kendra was no where to be found or even heard. I wondered if she had made it back to the jeep yet. She and my uncle wanted to go in, guns blazing. Well, we did. The two hunters that had tagged along were now dead. Stupid gun ho antics. She was just like my brother._

_I stopped abruptly and hid behind a large oak. The woods eerily silent. I shivered as I pulled the lighter from my jeans and lit it once again. I pulled out the busted GPS trying to fix it. I was turned around. Not good considering I had half a pack of vamps on my tail. A slight breeze swept over me and I heard the tree creek. I hated this... it was cold, wet, and dark. I hated the dark with a fiery passion. My ears perked at the sound of Kendra yelling my name. She's looking for me. Thank God, I thought. She knows the way._

"_Kendra," I whispered trying to stay quiet in my surroundings, like it would matter. Vampires had excellent hearing and smell. The nicks on my face and arm were just serving me up as bait. We shouldn't even be here. "Kendra?"_

_I slowly starting moving in the direction I had heard her voice, but froze as I heard a scurrying sound behind me. I squinted into the night surrounding me. I tried to light the Zippo lighter once more. Damn thing was about empty. I jerked when the hissing suddenly sounded closer. Too close. I moved slowly in a circle turning the lighter in my hand. I reached for my gun- it wasn't there. I had dropped it long ago. Like it would help against vampires anyhow. I turned sharply and tripped over what I suspect was a tree root sending me crashing into the ground. I searched the ground for my lighter, but felt nothing. God, that smell. What was that? It smelt like decaying bodies. I was on my knees still searching for the damned lighter. Where was Kendra?_

"_Ah ah ah..." a deep voice whispered. I jumped and tried to scramble to my feet, but it was no use. He was on top of my back already holding me to the cold wet ground. Kendra! My mind screamed. I cried as he griped my cut arm tightly digging his finger nails into my wound. My fingers finally touched my silver lighter. This was the leader of the pack we had been hunting, Nicodemus. He was around 1800 years old now. He was one of the founders. We were idiots to think we could take him on. He took the lighter from me softly as he pressed his lips to my ear, "Wouldn't want you to start any unwanted forest fires, now would we?"_

"_Go to Hell!" I yelled before he pressed a knee harder into my back. I screamed after that. It felt as if he had shoved his knee through my right kidney._

_He moaned and I shivered in response, "I __**love**__ it when you __**people**__ fight back. Makes me all giddy inside." _

_He gave a small chuckle as he traced his hand on along my back and I continued to struggle- as if it would do any good. I felt like I had a thousand pounds sitting on my back, "Get your damn filthy hands off of me!"_

_If I was going to die, not that I wanted to, but if I was- I was going down with a struggle. He grinned as he reached around to my stomach. His fingers were long and cold, icy, "Dear cousin is coming. I can smell the fear on her. You though..." he inhaled deeply "…no, you're angry. I like that."_

_He licked my ear before jamming his long razor like index finger into my stomach. I suddenly felt myself go dizzy as I screamed in agony trying to pull away. No. No. No. I wasn't about to die. Fight Ava. Fight. I could hear my dad's voice pleading over and over in my head. He pulled his finger from my stomach up to my rib cage. He was carving me, slowly. I felt tears pour out of my eyes. Oh God the pain. Is this what my brother felt like before he died? He laughed in my ear before kissing my temple, "Something to remember me by Ava."_

With a swift fluid movement I sat up quickly causing me cry out in pain. My hand flew to my side instantly. I had forgotten about my stitches. _Fuck. _I groaned as I laid back down slowly shutting my eyes trying to forget the pain. This was pain. The real pain of this situation, Kendra had just dropped me off and left. She _left_. Apparently on to the next hunt with her dad. My father's brother. Twin actually. Shawn and Greg. Fighting the immoral supernatural crime together. Until my dad was killed of course. Was Shawn anywhere to be found now? No. I was on my own. Again.

There was a knock on my door and I groaned inwardly as I wiped tears away from my face, "I'm fine Bobby."

The door cracked open slightly, "It's actually Sam." He entered cautiously standing near the foot of the bed. Not daring to get closer as if I were some rabid animal waiting to attack. "Bobby is out…running errands. Do you need anything before we crash?"

They must be dreadfully tired too. Sam's forehead was bandaged over his left eye. His right ring finger and pinky finger were taped together. He had been in some sort of brawl. The two brothers' were hunters. Famous hunters. After Bobby introduced them, it took me a few minutes to realize who they were. The ever famous Winchester's. The men who had caused the apocalypse to appear and the men that made it disappear. Some hunters were still thoroughly pissed about that. Because in return- things had gotten worse. A lot worse.

I shook my head, "I'm fine. Just really tired and sore."

He nodded politely, not believing me. I'm pretty sure the whole house heard my scream. But he wouldn't press the issue. He didn't seem like the type. "Just holler if you need us. We are down the hall."

"If I need you, trust me, you'll hear me." I laughed a bit, trying to lighten the mood. It wasn't like I was dying. I wondered if Bobby had told them my history yet. Could be the reason why I was getting special treatment at the moment.

He chuckled and started to back out of the room. He seemed like a nice enough guy though. I gave him a soft thank you smile and he paused, "By the way…when you're feeling up to it. I have a few questions about the lore and stuff. Just…you know…whenever."

Ah, ulterior motives. Figures. Oh well, I did say that I owed him one for stitching me up. I nodded just wanting him to leave me alone. I felt the heaviness of sleep creeping up and I didn't want to miss it. "Sure."

"Great. Night Ava."

"Ditto."

He closed the door and I let out a sigh as my head rolled toward the clock. 3Am. Bobby was running errands? No- Bobby was on a hunt. Damn him. I'm sure he went out with Shawn and Kendra. They wouldn't find the clan or Nicodemus. They were already packed and gone. I could feel it. I shifted uncomfortably as I felt the wound burn. He not only gave me a reminder of him…he had marked me. And just the thought of him finding me….scared the hell out of me.

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**Thanks for reading! Now go review! Purdy please. =)**


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural or the boys and I'm in no way affiliated with the show.**

**Hope You Enjoy.**

**AN: Sam does have his soul. =) I like him better this way.**

**And I realize there were a few errors – I apologize, I don't have a Beta.**

**And after reading the Chapter about five times…you miss a few things here and there. =)**

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Bobby had been extremely quiet for the past three days. Not even a peep for hours at a time. I imagined that Kendra told him the particular's of my run in with Nicodemus. He was still upset to say the least. He had Sam researching for more information revolving around that certain vampire for two days straight. I was correct in my assumption that the clan had fled shortly after I was brought to Bobby's. On top of everything else, I had almost gone hoarse telling Sam everything I knew about folklore, urban legends, and fairy tales. Every once in a while I would notice Dean standing in the door way of the parlor watching and listening intently. He was hard to read sometimes- acting as if he didn't care about the history of it all. As I was telling Sam about the 'true' story of Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs, Dean was smirking. He leaned against the door frame holding a cup of coffee, his free hand shoved into his pocket of his worn jeans listening carefully with an amused look on his face. Sam seemed fascinated that I knew so much, but the truth was that I had learned everything from my mother. She was brilliant when it came to history.

I let Sam go and on about the things that he thought was true and not true. I corrected here and there as he rambled. He was correct about most things, of course, Sam was very intelligent to begin with. In the short time of three days, I had come to learn that he went to Stanford for a bit. I found myself jealous at the thought. He had a normal life for a small period of time. There was a certain unspoken sadness in his eyes though that led me to believe the circumstances of his leaving Stanford were not the best. That and the fact that Dean become unnaturally quiet as Sam reminisced about his college days…that threw a big hint.

"I can see the Brothers Grimm being hunters. It makes so much sense."

I smiled at Sam's excitement of my revelation and stood up slowly, "I think that's enough lessons for one day class."

Sam laughed at me and Dean snorted, "You can tell she's older Sammy. She's a bit bossy- you think?"

I shook my head regretting telling them my age only to discover that I was a couple of months older than 'Sammy'. I patted Dean on the shoulder as I passed him, "You will still reach forty before us Dean."

His smirk fell. Sam and I both laughed, happily. Something hunters don't do often.

Bobby burst through the door then and startled us all. He slammed the door and practically stomped to his room like a five year old. I shifted my eyes to Dean and he met them with question. He started to open his mouth and the front door burst open once more revealing my uncle. Of course. Usually whenever Bobby was pissed it was my Uncle Shawn's fault. Well, the majority of the time.

"Where's the asshole?" Shawn yelled as he slammed the door back into its original position. He stumbled into the living room and then quickly turned losing his balance almost as he looked into the living area and then behind Dean and I.

Dean's face hardened, "And who are you addressing bub?"

Shawn cold blue eyes shifted toward me. It was a shame that my father and my uncle shared the same striking blue eyes plus the same blood line. I never much cared for him. He had to drag Kendra everywhere she didn't belong. Hunts and places she didn't even want to go on. She, however, fit the part of 'hunter'. She compared to Dean while I compared to Sam. I sometimes wished she was even my sister, so I could protect more properly.

"You….you screwed everything up."

"Excuse me?" I straightened as much as my stitches would allow. A few more weeks and these would be gone. I could finally move on. Shawn stepped closer, his grimy finger pointed at me, the smell of whiskey on his breath. He was disgusting.

Dean moved in front of me, his arms crossed, coffee mug abandoned somewhere. I felt a bit offended to think that he thought I couldn't take care of myself. I could fight my battles, maybe not at the moment, but I could. "I asked…who are you addressing?"

Shawn stood straighter, "You tell that shit of man that I will be back to get what's mine."

I stepped to the side so that I could see. Dean wasn't exactly short. Shawn's eyes connected with mine and I thought I saw a flash of something sweep over them. I scrunched my eyes in confusion and he spoke with a low growl in his voice, "Your parents are better off dead than knowing that you're settling with some demon lovers."

Everything else in that sentence didn't register. The only thing that registered was- 'parents are better off dead'. I pushed around Dean and punched him square in the jaw. My efforts prevailed somewhat, but only because he was half drunk. He fell back into the wall and landed with a thud on the floor. His eyes flamed as he struggled to get up. I grabbed my side as pain shot threw me. Dean slid his arm around the right side of my waist. "Sam!"

Sam was there instantly blocking Shawn from me. I looked down and saw blood already staining my blue t-shirt. _Wonderful. _Dean led me back to couch. I could hear Sam struggling to get him out the door. Dean left momentarily to Sam I assume. I honestly wasn't concerned with that because the burning in my side was making tears form in my eyes. I heard a dull ring form in my ears. I shook my head as I felt a tingle rise slowly through my back then suddenly I felt nothing but ice inflame my wound. I shivered in response as it passed just as quickly as it came. Dean was back lifting my shirt without asking pressing a beige colored towel to my side. He shook his head frustrated, "You shouldn't have punched him. Ripped half of these out."

"It was worth it," I said feeling my head swim. I closed my eyes. Dean told Sam to get the kit. I didn't want anymore stitches to be honest, but couldn't find the will to voice my opinion. I didn't want to hunt either. I wanted to be done with this bullshit and have a real life. A real life that didn't involve me bleeding every other day.

"I didn't realize you were left handed," Dean said quietly trying to make conversation. I took a breath and opened my eyes. His green eyes, I found, were concerned. This struck me as odd. No one had ever showed concern except Bobby. I had know Bobby for years though. I hadn't even known Dean more than 72 hours and here he wanted to be my protector. I didn't need a protector. I was just fine on my own.

"My mom was too," I said simply.

I could hear Bobby and Sam whispering harshly in the kitchen. My presence here seemed to be causing problems for everyone. If I had anywhere else to go- I would. Dean nodded, "You'll have to teach me that left hook."

I met his eyes, they were bright with amusement. I smiled, forgetting my annoyance for him protecting me. I then looked down at his hands and took in how strong they seemed. _Why wouldn't you want him protecting you? _My heart clenched at the thought, but left just as quickly as the thought of what happened to my brother popped in my head without warning, "I'll hold the towel."

He hesitated and then removed his blood stained hands. "Thank you…for stepping in Dean."

He nodded in response as he pushed himself off the floor allowing Sam to step in. He turned from the doorway and watched for a second. He looked conflicted, sad that I had pretty much made him leave. And it was for his own good. I met his eyes just as he swallowed looking down. He quickly turned and left. This was technically a good thing. Getting attached to me would just get him killed in the end.

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Bobby never mentioned what it was that my Uncle Shawn wanted. Whatever it was though scared me. If he wanted it that bad…what would he do to get it? More importantly- what the hell was it? I had spent the past few days trying to rack my brain thinking of things that Shawn could have lent him. Nothing came up. I even asked Bobby a few times which led to him snapping at him and telling me I should mind my own damn business. Sam was in the room at the time and was a bit shell-shocked to say the least. When Sam spoke up- Bobby told him to go to hell. Unfortunately, Bobby had forgotten one thing…he had.

After that the house was…odd. No one spoke to one another. If we did speak to one another, it was to snap at them for something. We were all on edge. Our nerves were amped up by a billion points. The events that really stuck out in my head. Yesterday morning Dean burnt himself on the stove, picked up a glass in frustration and chunked it at the wall sending it into a thousand pieces. My thoughts- _Holy Shit…what an arm_. Granted that wasn't the reaction that 'normal' people have, but it was mine. He cleaned it up silently a few hours later with his face red from embarrassment. I decided not to help because I assumed it would only add to his situation.

Sam had an episode similar to Dean's yesterday also. He was carrying a stack of books down the stairs- haphazardly I might add- he slipped on the bottom step and the motion sent the books flying. In his rage he kicked the wall in the foyer…which now had a very large hole above the trim. That in turn put Bobby in a rage. He began 'throwing' books at Sam. Dean had to break them up.

To be honest I had no clue what was going on. Maybe I was actually cursed as my uncle had told me when my brother died. I had kept my distance from the males of the house. Sam and Bobby were still fuming at one another today. Dean was no where to be found. At the moment, he seemed to be the only sane one that didn't show signs of 'cabin fever'.

"You know where Dean is?"

"How the hell should I know? Do I look like his fuckin' babysitter?" Sam spat out at him. My eyes widened a bit in shock. His eyes dangerously dark in anger. I noticed something…something flashed through them. Just like with Shawn's. I felt my cheeks heat and my head tingle. My face hardened at the thought, _How dare he speak to me like that!_

I found myself picking up an antique ashtray off of the table in the hallway and hurling it at him as I screamed, "You're an asshole!"

I turned quickly before hearing the glass item crash. Sam was cussing, throwing things- I needed to get out of here. I practically ran out the backdoor. I ran my hand through my hair trying to calm myself down, never…_never_ have I felt this angered…about something so _small_. My ears perked at the pinging sound- I turned toward the garage. My veins felt on fire. Dean was underneath my jeep, tools spread out all around him, bottles of oil in a stack beside the tire. I felt my eyes drift down next to the porch where a piece of lead piping had been discarded. I bent down slowly, picked it up and griped it tightly. _No one messed with anything of mine. _I could hear a hissing noise start in my ears. It sounded like a whisper of something on the wind, extremely faint. I walked heavily towards my green jeep. My task at hand, literally. The bastard doesn't think I can take care of myself. _He thinks you're a child Ava._ I growled at the thought. My eyes twitched as I moved the pipe to my right hand and hit his foot hard with my boot.

He jumped underneath the vehicle and then there was a loud bang. He had hit his head I assume. I smirked at the thought, but it quickly faded, "What the hell are you doing?"

He slid out quickly rubbing his forehead…eyes suddenly moving from me to the lead pipe in my hand cautiously. "Ava?"

"I asked you a question jerk off…what the hell are you doing to my Jeep?"

I griped the pipe tighter. The hissing noise louder now. I could make out the words finally. _Kill. Kill. Kill. _I shook my head feeling disoriented. His eyes wide as he reached for his gun lying beside the right tire. His eyes flashed red. I could see it now. Something was wrong with us. _Kill. _It didn't matter what I thought…because all I could see was rage. I felt my whole body twitch. _Kill him Ava_.I raised the pipe back and started to charge forward but the shot that rang out made me pause with confusion. I felt the heat in my veins train away. The twitching stopped suddenly. The whispers in my ears began to fade away. I blink a few times before I looked up at my lead pipe and down at Dean's gun.

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=)

I'm evil. Hehe.

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	3. Chapter 3

A big thank you for ya'll who are reviewing!

*throws a few cyber cookies to ya'll*

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When I pause to think of all the close calls I've had with death…the pausing was extremely long. In fact, by the time I was fourteen, I had already died once. And this close call wasn't really a close call at all, but an actual death experience. After being tossed across the room by a vengeful ghost…my heart stopped for exactly five minutes. Technically…I should have brain damage. Or maybe I did have brain damage because if I was as smart as I thought myself to be- I would have quit this hunting crap long ago. Unfortunately, that wasn't the case. Which brings me to recall all of the times I've been tied to a chair? After adding this particular time into the equation…three.

I awoke to yelling…no, maybe more like shouting. The kind of shouting that was the spawn from a horn off of a train and then a tea kettle going off at the same time…over an intercom. Then maybe add a hangover to it. Yes, sounded about right. My head was killing me. I slowly opened my eyes fearing what the light may do to my retinas. I felt my jaw slack a bit as I took in my 'predicament' or 'our' predicament rather. The four of us were tied to chairs that were placed in a circle. _Wonderful. _Dean, who sat directly across from me, his anger filled eyes focused on me. I ignored him and continued to study our surroundings. We were still in Bobby's house, the study to be exact. On the floor, there was some kind of creepy circle design that was formed around us. Whoever had done so had used salt. So, long story short- we were either one of three things.

1. A sacrifice.

2. In a circle of protection.

3. Or I was referring back to option number one. This meant…we were shit out of luck.

"Nice to see you awake princess," Dean snorted.

Sam groaned, "God, you are such an asshole."

Dean narrowed his eyes at him, "What was that demon boy?"

_Why did people keep calling him 'demon' boy? _I moaned feeling my head pound. Did they seriously not have a headache?

Bobby sighed heavily, "Would both of you five year olds shut the hell up!"

"What's going on?" I asked tugging against the ropes harshly. My shoulder suddenly started throbbing. My eyes widened in horror as I took in the blood soaking my shirt. I felt my cheeks heat as I shot a deathly gaze at Dean, "You shot me! You fucking shot me!"

"Hey you were about to brain me with that damn pipe! Beside I 'grazed' you. Big difference sweetheart."

_Sweetheart? I'll show him sweetheart_. I struggled against my ropes despite the pain in my wrists. I was going to _kill_ him. "You could have killed me."

"Trust me, if I was aiming to kill. I would have," he leaned forward with a smartass smirk on his face. I growled as I tried to pull my legs free. "I never miss my target."

"You couldn't even find the damn target if it was glued to your humungous nose!"

"Hey!"

There was a sudden _whoosh_ of air. I froze in place as the man with a beige trench coat sat a bag of _something_ down on the desk. He just 'appeared' out of thin air. The men seemed unfazed by this. No one thought this to be…weird?

"Good to see you are all awake." He spoke flatly sounding like he honestly didn't care. _Who the hell?_

"What the hell Cas?" Dean yelled as he struggled with his ropes. Sam began pulling at his too. Bobby stared at Sam with a murderous look on his face. "Untie us. This is ridiculous!"

Cas or whoever the hell he was said, _no_. "I'm afraid I can't do that."

"Hey, I don't know who you are or what you want…" I began but trailed off as he whipped his head back around in my direction. His face was stern, unforgiving, reminding me of some murderer.

"I am Castiel, an angel of…"

Dean interrupted, "Of the Lord, on an impossible mission, a lone ranger…yea yea. Why can't you untie us?"

Sam growled, "Seriously Cas…after all we've done for you."

Castiel looked around and mumbled something about an amulet then _disappeared. _

"Oh my God…he really is an angel."

"A dead one," Bobby said lowly.

Sam laughed loudly. His eyes flashed red, "Finally something we agree on."

I was aware that demons were real, but never considered the possibility of angels. Never. If so, where had my 'guardian' angel been this whole entire time while my family was being slaughtered like cattle? There was another _swoosh_ as the reappearing, disappearing _Cas_ brightened the room with his cheerful presence. Between Bobby and Sam arguing, throwing profanities back and forth like it was candy, and then, Dean staring as if he's trying to set me on fire…I really wish Dean would have aimed better.

"The Amulet of Rameign, it's used to protect from evil. Your uncle found it, unfortunately, it was cursed by the demon Shadin. Instead of protecting from evil it makes it grow. Any evil you have…inside…it amplifies it." That's why you want to kill one another."

That's what Shawn was trying to do. Bobby must have taken the amulet. The men paused in their banter and Dean stared at Cas before blinking rapidly.

"I arrived in time before Bobby could stab Sam. It was barely enough time to change the bullet's direction. You would have died for certain."

I met Castiel's eyes a split second before he turned away digging through his black leather bag. He started setting things out on the desk. We were all silent. I could feel Dean's eyes on me. He had meant to kill me, but the _lone ranger_ stopped him. To him, I was thankful. Of course, the thing was…I tried to kill Dean too. Some curse. One that makes you go crazy.

"What about my uncle?"

"He's fine. He wasn't in its presence very long." He mumbled.

I sniffed, feeling relief wash over me. I caught Dean's eyes. He was watching me closely. I cut my eyes away from him toward Bobby, "You took it?"

"It…called to me." Bobby said softly. "You wouldn't understand kid."

I'm sure I could if he explained it, but obviously he felt bad enough about the issue. I didn't press any further. Cas was moving around us setting things on the ground, pouring some kind of liquid on the salt. He placed the amulet on the floor in the center of us. I felt my cheeks burning again. Dean cleared his throat, "God, I feel so pissed right now. That normal?"

"It's the amulet's pull. You feel anger. Sam feels power. Bobby feels revenge. Ava feels…"

I cut my eyes toward him, wordlessly telling him to stop. He did. Suddenly changing the subject, "You have to make amends. It is part of the ritual."

"Make amends?" Dean said confused as his eyes focused on the amulet. He was struggling with his bonds.

"Apologize to one another jack ass," Bobby spat out with a roll of his eyes.

"Never were the smart one, where you Dean?" Sam said bitterly_. Brothers_.

"I'll go first," I said quickly. I just wanted to get out of here. I wanted to be untied. I wanted to be away from everyone.

Castiel nodded, "Apologize to those you've offended."

_Seriously? Even if what we said was true? _Sam shook his head, "This is stupid."

"Dean...I didn't want to kill you." I closed my eyes. This was stupid. Just apologize and then you'll be done. "I'm sorry for the way I acted…towards you all."

Defeat is what I felt, but at the same time I felt…release. The amulet started glowing red. "Huh. Guess it's working."

Bobby nodded quickly, "Yea…I'm sorry too guys. Sam…I…didn't mean the hell remark."

Sam cast his eyes away as he affirmed his apology with a slow nod, "I know. I apologize for my actions as well. I'll even fix the whole in the wall."

Bobby laughed and Sam smiled. I could feel the pressure in the room start to weaken as the amulet glowed an even brighter red. I could see the light radiating off of the guys faces. Almost. All three of us stared at Dean. His eyes were still on the amulet. Never wavering as he spoke, "I never wanted…you guys are the only family that I have. I never meant to hurt any of you. Ya'll know that."

He laughed bitterly. The room was quiet for a few moments longer. Was that his apology? Would that even work? Bobby and Sam shifted their gaze to Castiel. He stood silent, solemn, still watching Dean. Maybe he wasn't finished. "I'm sorry."

The red light flashed white suddenly and I felt a breeze sweep around us as the room shook. Our ropes fell off of us instantly. I rubbed my wrists gingerly before looking at my shoulder. It stung as blood slowly rolled down my arm and dripped slowly off of my arm. I had a puddle forming underneath the chair, maybe that was why I had a headache. Blood loss. _Wonderful, more freaking stitches_. Sam was there beside me checking my shoulder. He looked over at Castiel then back at me, "Cas, do you mind?"

I turned my head just in time to see him put his hand on my shoulder, before I could protest there was a surge of energy that invaded my body. My skin seemed to tingle as he pulled his hand away, "Both wounds are healed."

"Healed?" I pulled the sleeve of my t-shirt up, no injury. My eyes widened in surprise. _Wow._ I pulled the side of my shirt up over my stomach. There wasn't a gash, no stitches, no scar. I smiled as I turned around, "Thank you…"

He was gone.

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My dad once told me that there were things in this world that I wouldn't understand. Then he proceeded to show me the boogey man that lived in my closet was real. I was six. I remember that day like it was yesterday, my protective dad standing in front of me as he poured a salt line in front of the door trapping the creature. I would never forget the way my mom scolded him after he showed me.

'_**She's gotta' learn sometime Sharlene.'**_

'_**Seriously Greg? By scaring the crap out of her? Great parenting skills.'**_

My brother laughed at me for crying and then explained to me that our family was special. I believed him. As it turned out 'special' wasn't quite the word my mom used. She said that we were cursed. Dad laughed when she said 'cursed' and then proceeded with,_** 'You mean doomed right honey?'**_

My mom and dad met when they were just teenagers. Their families would hunt together sometimes during the year. The Martin's and the Swallow's. They used to make jokes about the family motto when we were children, _**'Two birds of a feather flock together.'**_ That was so long ago…it almost seemed like ancient history.

I held my silver necklace in my hands as I sat on the front porch staring at the sunset, I was leaving tomorrow morning. My wounds were healed thanks to the _lone ranger_ and I was ready to break out of this joint. I loved Bobby, but he was beginning to drive me insane. The Winchester's hadn't been any better. Sam was bombarding me with questions as much as he could before I left. I was tired of talking about the supernatural though. Dean had avoided me like the plague. Either he was still a bit upset with me or just ashamed he shot me. Either one, didn't matter, by this time tomorrow I wouldn't be here. I turned my attention back to my necklace running my thumb over the delicate groves. A simple sterling silver chain with a bird frozen in time, its wings spread as if soaring. My parents had given it to me for my eighteenth birthday.

When I was sixteen, I had been complaining about moving, as always. We were about to pick up and move again, but I wanted a normal life. I was about to win the vote for head cheerleader. Some of the cutest boys in school were showing interest in me. I was so mad about moving that I threw a fit, like some preteen. I had been so selfish then.

'_**I hate this family. I wish I wasn't your daughter!'**_

I still remember the hurt that flowed out of my father's eyes as he gave a short nod and walked away. We didn't move. I had won that small battle. We stayed for another two years.

'_**Happy birthday baby bird,' my dad said cheerfully as he handed me a petite box. I opened the small turquoise box to reveal a beautiful silver bird soaring. Its wings spread as far as they would allow. My heart ached in my chest. I wish I could be like that bird, I thought.**_

'_**We thought it was appropriate for you. You are such a free spirit Ava Adele.' My mother kissed me on the cheek before taking the necklace from me gently and placing it on my neck. A 'caged' free spirit, I thought.**_

Eleven days later, they were killed. Three months later, Aaron and I packed up and left. I had never felt so guilty in my life. If we had moved- would my parents still be alive? I pulled my sweater closer to me feeling the night air settling in.

"Hey…"

I swallowed back tears quickly and produced a smile as I looked up at Dean, "Hey."

He sat down beside me on the porch stairs as the sun began to slowly fade. His arms resting on his knees, strong hands holding onto his beer bottle as his eyes watched me rub the necklace. I glanced at him and then back down. "Birthday present from my parents. It's pretty much the last thing I have left."

It fell quiet between us. I could faintly smell beer on the breeze. I assumed that this wasn't his first beer tonight. There was a smell of bacon that seemed to shadow the alcohol and I quickly decided that a bacon sandwich would make me the happiest woman in the world. My stomach growled in agreement. I laughed softly, "Sorry. I'm starving. I haven't really eaten anything all day."

"I'm sorry for shooting you." He blurted out quickly ignoring my previous statement. It became clear why he wasn't speaking to me now. He was ashamed. I shook my head in protest, "Dean, you've already apologized. That stupid amulet…"

He stopped me, "No, seriously, evil thoughts or not. I…I could have killed you. I should have had better control."

I remained silent letting him have his moment of self pity. He always took responsibility, even if there was nothing for him to be sorry for. I could see there was no point in arguing with him. Another gust of wind blew sending a shiver through my body and I picked up another scent. His shampoo or after shave…something. He smelled amazing. _You're leaving tomorrow Ava_. _Stop it_.

"You know, being a hunter wasn't always my plan." He turned his head to study me as I pressed on, "But now…I feel like it's the only thing I'm good at."

I heard him swallow and I looked back down at my necklace. _**'Time to go baby bird.'**_ I could hear my father say softly.

"Know the feelin'." Dean mumbled as he lifted the bottle to his lips. I smiled a bit as I nodded, of course he would understand. I sighed and put my necklace back on. Tomorrow was a new day. My mom always said, _**'It's a new adventure Ava. Smile.' **_She was always so optimistic.

"Come with us." I snapped my head toward Dean. I thought I hadn't heard him correctly at first. I scrunched my eyebrows in confusion. I pulled my sweater closer to me and crossed my arms as another chill swept through me. He repeated with a smirk, "Come with us. Me and Sammy."

I laughed out loud then. He didn't laugh with me. He just held a smirk that made his eyes sparkle in the drowning sun. I sat there and stared in awe at this stranger before me who had just tried to kill me. Instead of what a normal person would do- which was run away, quickly. I smiled. I felt like I could trust him. "Okay."

He grinned, "Awesome."

He jumped up and yelled as he stepped heavily back inside, "Sammy, she said yes. Help her move her crap."

Bobby hollered, "Thank God."

I grinned brightly as I turned my attention back to the nonexistent sunset. _Oh boy_.

'_**It's a new adventure Ava. Smile.'**_

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Hope ya'll enjoyed!

Reviews are Rainbows! =)

-Andrea


	4. Chapter 4

_To my loney 3 reviewers-Ya'll are awesome._

_Ziggymia123, angeleyenc, smile2mii._

_To the other silent stalkers- Thanks for reading!_

_:)_

_Enjoy._

**_an: bold italics are memories/past events_**

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Traveling with the Winchester's was…an experience…to say the least. I haven't traveled with someone in _years_. My brother was the last person I traveled with and it was easy for us considering that was what we were used to since we _were_ brother and sister. I think it was also an experience for Dean and Sam too. Not so much someone traveling with them, but a female someone. Dean seemed to forget I was there, often. In fact, looking up to see him strolling out of the shower with a towel wrapped _loosely_ around his waist was beginning to be a common occurrence. Not that I complained at the occasional six-pack eye full and sometimes the…_bulge_ in the front of the towel. I had seen Dean's bare ass more than once also…especially when he's fresh out of the shower in the wee early hours. I'm not really a light sleeper. I wanted to tell him, so bad, that when he took his 2a.m. showers…I could _hear_ the soft grunts and it made it extremely hard for me to sleep. The freaking walls in motels were paper thin.

Sam wasn't any better either. In fact, he liked to strut around in a towel also. I was beginning to think I was invisible or maybe they did _want_ me to look. Either way…as far as I could tell…they had a few certain _qualities_ in common. Good qualities.

One incident that happened about two weeks ago, that is still fresh in my mind…Dean saw me naked. Granted, it was just a few seconds, but still…he saw me _naked_. I had to travel with this guy…I had to see him every day. Honestly, he was just as surprised as I was.

The boys had left earlier that morning, FBI suits n' all, by the time I woke up. Sam had left me a note saying that they would be back later in the afternoon with food and updates on 'the case'. It was only 11a.m. and I honestly never expected anyone. I saw this as an opportunity to take a long needed bath, relax, and to shave all of the appropriate areas. I hadn't closed the bathroom door to begin with (I mean, it was cracked, but you think someone would notice someone taking a bath in the room next to you). I dried off with my towel and tossed it on the floor before walking out of the bathroom. Suddenly, I became very aware that I was not alone. My brown eyes widened as I saw Dean's green eyes meet mine. This wave of shock reached his face as his arms sprung into action sending the paper he was reading up to cover his face.I was pretty sure that he kind of yelled, _'Holy shit'_ as I screamed, _'Holy Fuck'_ before darting back into the bathroom, slamming the door behind me. I was frozen in place for what seemed forever with my shoulder pressed firmly against the door as if he were going to come in.

After a few minutes and after mustering up the courage, I secured my towel around my body and cracked the door, "Dean?"

I didn't hear anything for at least twenty seconds and then, "Yea?"

"Can…can you hand me my bag?"

I was leaning over enough that only my bare shoulder was visible. I could feel the strands of my dark blond hair (that was in desperate need of a trim) sticking to my shoulders and neck. It was beginning to dry- guess I'd be doing the usual style today- curly. I watched him as he silently picked up my red duffel bag and walk backward toward the bathroom. His hand was griping the straps so tight his knuckles were turning white. I pursed my lips trying not to laugh. He bumped into the corner and then quickly held it out. I had to open the door in order to get it. I pulled the door all the way open keeping one hand firmly on my towel. I didn't need a repeat.

I paused when my hand met his as I took the duffel. His head was bent toward the floor, his body stiff, and he was breathing rather quickly. I let out a breath as moved his head an inch to the right and watched me take the bag. As soon as I did…he took off toward the motel door snatching his keys of the table in the process. He closed the door softly and moments later the Impala started.

I didn't talk to Dean for two days after that.

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Developing a friendship with them wasn't difficult at all. They were actually easy to get along with. Dean had his moments as well as Sam and I'm sure I did too. We had been traveling on the road for two months now and I had driven twice. This bothered me somewhat, but I wasn't going to take it personally. Apparently this car was something special and there was the fact that it belonged his dad. Sam and I would switch sometimes, so that way he could spread out in the back seat. Honestly, his _spreading out_ didn't look that comfortable for a man who was 6'4.

I glanced in the back seat where Sam was sleeping. I had noticed lately that he looked pained sometimes like he was having a nightmare. I brushed my hair away from my face as I dug for a ponytail holder in the front zipper of my back pack. The weather was amazing today and the windows were slightly cracked just enough to make a cool breeze. Dean looked peaceful, eyes focused on the road, humming softly with the song on the radio that was a lot lower than it should be. The noise hardly ever bothered Sam, in fact, I think it helped him. Usually if Dean had the radio low, he wanted to talk or he was looking for the moment to talk. I glanced at the clock, 5:42p.m. The sun was beginning to pass over the hills giving the desert a beautiful golden red hue. The only reason I loved the desert- gorgeous sunsets. We were about eleven miles from the nearest town and only thirty miles from our next case. We had been driving for days. Our last case was in Vermont…now we were off to the outskirts of the Arizona. After this case, I actually wanted to drive into California for a few days…maybe go to the beach. I hadn't mentioned it to Dean yet. He didn't strike me as a beach guy.

I put my hair in a quick bun, fine short hairs still tickling my brow and ears. I shoved my sunglasses up onto my head and grabbed the file sitting between me and Dean. He glanced over as I opened it and he gave a long sigh, "I don't like cases that involve kids."

"Yea…me too." I said softly as I flipped through the paper copies of pictures with missing children on them. It seemed wrong that the children were smiling. They all had disappeared in the same playground area between the hours of 2pm and 4pm. The children, boys and girls, were between the ages of 5 and 9. "This one article mentions that there was a clear slime substance found at the playground. Apparently…it's in abundance there."

"Yea, Sam called the newspaper earlier and they said no matter what they do to clean it off…it's present with every abduction," he made a face and shook his head mumbling _'gross'_. Slime didn't sound like a fun time to me either especially if our _monster _was producing it. I had no intentions of _wanting_ to be covered in slime.

"Hmm. You know, I remember reading about this case a few years back…there was an unsolved case in the 20's in Ohio where an elementary school of 15 children disappeared. There was a trail of slime that led to the sewers, but they never recovered the bodies."

Dean glanced at me with a sour look on his face, "I hate sewers."

I laughed as I pictured him down in the sewers stepping in crap before muttering a string of his colorful phrases. I agreed with him as I closed the file before tossing it on the dash, "I can call my uncle- see if he knows of anything."

He looked at me with a caution shadowing his face, "Thought you weren't speaking to him. You know…after…"

I shrugged and kicked my flip flops off before crossing my legs Indian style. His gaze lingered longer before he looked away. I felt my heart skip a few beats as he licked his lips. '_God, he was sexy sometimes_.' And it wasn't intentionally the majority of the time. "I can't stay mad forever…even if I do hate him. He's family. Besides- he was under the 'curse of the evil amulet'. If he can help us…then there isn't a reason for me to avoid him."

"I honestly don't believe that your hatred of him just goes back to Bobby's."

I turned my eyes toward him and held his gaze for a moment. This just got personal. He never wanted to talk about my personal things. Sam tended to poke and prod, but when Dean did…it was different somehow. He didn't keep on and on about things. He would sit and wait, patiently. He would even go on about something else, just waiting. He was patient with me. He wasn't always so patient with Sam, "My parents were hunting a Wendigo in Washington. After a few days they realized that there were two. They called Shawn- asked for his help- he said yes."

"I take it he screwed up somehow," he said after I held my silence for minutes. I stared out the window at the lowering sun. They night stretched on behind us. It seemed like we were trying to out run the darkness.

I snorted in response before continuing, "He said he would be there in a few hours. They waited a day, he didn't show. So, they went in on their own. They were killed. Aaron got the call from a local hunter…and Shawn…well, he was gambling in Las Vegas- drunk off his ass."

The car filled with silence after that. I didn't want to call my uncle right away about this slime problem. I would do it later when I was alone. I wanted to talk to Kendra also…make sure was okay. She had a tendency of getting injured, a lot, while hunting with her dad. He wasn't the type to watch your back. He's too busy watching his own. My brother and I had found that out several times. Aaron wanted to hunt with them though, because they were _family_. As far as I was concerned, Shawn wasn't related to me. Kendra was like a sister to me, but her dedication to her dad was undeniable and unbreakable. That bothered me somewhat because sooner or later…that wouldn't end well for her.

"So…Shawn is an asshole. And I should feel free to beat the shit out of him. Got it." Dean said startling me from my thoughts. I turned my head to study him- if he was serious or not. His jaw was firmly set, left hand moving with the steering wheel every few seconds with his elbow resting casually on the door as his right hand was lying in his lap. His face was stern as he glared at the road. He felt me watching him and his face softened as he shifted his eyes toward me. I'd bet my last twenty bucks that he was a gentle giant, but then again, I'm almost eighty percent sure he wasn't joking. He smirked at me and I smiled back. I wasn't sure if I was happy about him beating the crap out of Shawn or not, but it did sound good. I gave a soft laugh and shook my head as his smirk went to full blown grin.

"Wanna be my hero then?"

He opened his mouth to say something, but saw that Sam was stirring in the back seat. He cleared his throat. And personal conversation, _gone._ I looked away as Sam sat up yawning. He stretched as best as he could, "Where are we?"

"Um…" I reached for the map on the dash and gave it a once over while trying to seem normal. "A few miles outside of Sheveling. I think we should stop there for the night…drive the rest of the way in tomorrow morning."

"Sounds good to me. All I know is that I need to piss and I'm starving." Dean said giving a yawn as he ran his fingers through his hair scratching his scalp.

Sam nodded in agreement. He leaned over the front seat and titled his head with a smirk on his face, "I miss anything exciting?"

I glanced at Dean who was scrunching his eyebrows at the back of Sam's head. I quickly shifted my eyes back to Sam's before he saw me watching him. I smiled and nodded, "Yea. Totally missed me naked…I stripped down and climbed out the window…surfed on the hood. It was epic."

Sam let out a loud chuckle as he sat back, "So not much then huh?"

I met Dean's eyes as he searched my face. I could see a small question in his eyes, but he said nothing. I looked back out the window, "Yep...not much."

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Later that evening, Bobby had called Dean to let him know that a few fellow hunters that he knew caught and killed the _Slug_ or at least that's what Dean had called it. It was a man-thing that secreted a sedative like slime. He covered his victims, at least ten children or five adults, depending on the preference of the _Slug_. He fed on them the victims for ten years while in hibernation. Only five out of seven children were found alive.

I was happy because the thing had been taken care of, really I was, but now we were in Arizona, practically in the middle of nowhere with no job. I was about out of cash and needed to come up with some. I wasn't completely taken with the idea of using fraudulent cards, yet. I had spent some of my money on a 20 ounce Pepsi, a bag of M'Ms, and a pack of Marlboro Reds. I had grabbed one of Dean's lighters out of the glove compartment and made my way to the pool that wasn't really a pool. It had about a foot of dirty water in the bottom. It looked like it hadn't been in use in quite some time. Kicking off my flip flops, I plopped down onto the edge of the pool dangling my feet off the side. I guess I could pretend there was water, I smirked. I lit one of the cigarettes and gave a long sigh watching the smoke float away into the air. I noticed how brilliant the stars looked. I had to smile, but then I began to wonder what the hell I was doing here. Why had I decided to come with the guys?

I should have stayed where I could have kept an eye on Kendra. I shook my head taking another pull off of the cigarette.

'_**I can't really talk right now Ava.'**_

'_**Why? What's wrong?'**_

_**I heard the hesitation in her voice, 'Dad…he…you know, the usual.'**_

_**The usual meant he was drunk and injured leaving Kendra to care for him.**_

'_**You should come out and meet us. You would love Sam and Dean. Amazing hunters…reminds me of the old days with the family. You know?'**_

'_**I…I really can't Ava. He needs me.'**_

'_**No…he doesn't. He needs a slave. He's a washed up hunter who needs to sober his ass up.'**_

'_**God! You never understand where I'm coming from! He's my dad Ava. Remember? My dad's not dead. He's still alive,' she spat out.**_

_**I swallowed dryly, 'I need to go. I'll talk to you soon. Love you- be safe.'**_

'_**Ava…Ava wai..' I hung up without a second thought.**_

I tossed the butt into the pool and pulled out another one lighting it quickly. I opened my bag of M'Ms and let a few roll out into my hand before popping them into my mouth. I heard the faint sound of heavy foot steps coming up behind me. I already knew who it was before he said anything. The gate that lead into the pool area whined as walked through it.

"How's the water?"

I shrugged, "Feels like a hot tub."

"Really? Then I have to join you. A shame we're wearing clothes though."

I laughed as he eased himself down beside me, "You've already seen me naked Dean…once is enough to traumatize you."

He gave an odd chuckle…a nervous one. Maybe he wasn't traumatized after all. I held the bag of M'Ms out toward him and he took them gladly pouring a few in his hand, "What are you doing out here?"

I could hear him crunching slowly and I moved the bottle of Pepsi between us. He opened it taking a swig from it. It wasn't the first time we had shared a drink. We shared a lot of things come to think of it. I shrugged, "Enjoying the evening."

He pulled my phone from his pocket and sat it down between us. I sighed as I looked away taking another drag off my _cancer stick_. My mom would always complain when dad lit up and then when she wasn't around he would hand me one and say, _'It works wonders on stress.'_

"She called my phone too. Bobby gave her the number I guess." He took another sip of the Pepsi before putting the cap back on it.

"She's an idiot," I mumbled before flicking the cigarette into the pool.

He watched me closely and nodded, "That why you're smokin'?

He'd only seen me smoke twice now. Both after talking to Kendra, go figure. I snatched the bag of candy from his lap and popped a few in my mouth, "You sound like my mom."

He laughed, "Well…that would be awkward."

He looked away as I shook my head and laid back on the cool concrete with my right arm underneath my head. My eyes traced the patterns of the stars and I smiled remembering doing the same with my brother, "How would that be awkward? You know, you act like my dad sometimes too. Starting to think you are him incarnate."

He licked his lips and turned his head toward me slightly, "That day in the motel room…didn't traumatize me."

I held the lighter in my hand flipping it over and over in my hand as I pretended to count the stars. What he said registered after a few moments. I shifted my eyes to him confused, "Huh?"

He turned his whole body toward me, his knee grazing my short clad thigh. I suddenly felt self conscious of my body. I tugged my t-shirt down as he seemed to move closer to me. The parking lot lights were buzzing loudly. I could hear the crickets chirping. The moon overhead was a thumbnail. I swallowed wondering how I could smoke two cigarettes and still feel my heart thumping out of my chest. He shook his head, "I wasn't traumatized when I left, Ava. I left…because…all I wanted to do was kiss you. And somehow…it didn't seem like the right time…you know, with…with you naked and all."

"Some people would probably disagree with you," I said softly shifting my gaze to his lips.

He smirked at my comment and then his lips were hovering over mine, "I just…you are on the road with us. I can't screw that up…Bobby would have my ass."

"You do have a cute ass," I mumbled with a smirk. He laughed and lifted his hand to my face. He caressed my cheek with his right thumb. His hand was callused and firm, but it seemed to mold to my face. He leaned closer to me and I could smell his aftershave, and the chocolate on his breath. I felt my heart pump faster as I lifted my head closer to him, "And you thought I was asleep…"

He smiled and I felt his lips brush mine softly. Butterflies invaded my stomach and swam down to my toes. How could someone's lips feel that soft?

"Dean? Ava?" Dean jerked away from me as if he had been burned. I sat up quickly and starting picking up my things as if nothing had ever happened. I glanced back and Sam stood there was this odd look on his face, "Um…Bobby is on the phone…has a new case in Utah. Look's like a demon."

_Oh, right, our job._ Dean was already on his feet leaving me behind as quickly as he could, "Good deal."

I stood up and headed for the motel room trying to keep my head down and away from Sam, but I couldn't miss that look in his eyes. That disappointed look. The look of rejection was written all over. The one look I wanted to avoid completely with the boys. I failed, miserably because suddenly I felt rejected too.

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	5. Chapter 5

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We were within an hour of reaching our destination of the small town, Piner Springs, home of about eight hundred people, and one demon. Piner Springs was nestled up against a lake where people had a tendency to go missing. This was all recent of course. The only reason Bobby assumed it was a demon was because of the sulfur levels _in_ the lake. I quickly added it could be some kind of a mermaid turned demon that was a siren luring men to their deaths while camping (since all the missing persons were male). Neither of my traveling male companions found this funny. It was just a joke, mermaids didn't exist. Or at least I was pretty sure that they didn't. I was at least sixty percent sure.

I glanced over my journal at Dean as he answered his phone with a _'Hey Bobby'_. The only two words he had said _all day_. I sighed and Sam turned around slightly with a tired smirk on his face.

"You keep a journal?"

"A long time ago. I don't really write in it anymore." I frowned as I flipped through it landing on the last page. I felt my heart quench. I flipped back to my previous page, "It's more from when I traveled with my parents. I have a few entries from hunting with my brother."

He nodded and pulled out a leather bound frail journal, "Dad's. This thing has saved our asses more times than I can count. It's old school though. Not a lot of new age supernatural stuff in here though."

I sat up and moved forward catching Dean's eyes in the rearview momentarily. He went back to talking and ignoring me. I cleared my throat handing Sam my journal, "My mom used to give me a quote every day. She started doing that when I was like…eleven. She would write it down on a piece of paper and tape it to the head board before me and my brother would wake up."

Sam smirked as he flipped through reading the pieces of paper my mother had written on. Quote after quote written on napkins, notebook paper, receipts, bubblegum wrappers, and sticky notes. It was basically whatever she could get her hands on. I always kept mine. My brother always threw his away. Dean snapped his phone shut and tossed it on the dash. Sam glanced over at him then back down. I continued on, "Sometimes I didn't make an entry…I just taped the quote on a page. It's like having a little piece of her."

I watched as he flipped to the bookmark that I had sticking out halfway through the blue hardcover journal. The journal was so old now. I was going back through and reading the entries I had made along with quotes. I heard him swallow before reading the quote on the day that I had just marked, "_'He who seeks evil will find it'._"

Dean glanced over at the page before I snatched it out of his hands. My heart pounded as I snapped it shut. Sam and Dean looked at me bewildered, "Sorry…it's just private. You understand."

Dean looked forward not saying a word, as usual today, but Sam was still watching me closing. God, he was probably going to corner me later and as if I wanted to talk about it. The things that I had written down in the journal were more than private. They were almost sacred, sometimes the only things that kept me sane. Reading them was a way to remind myself that the past was the past and wasn't my fault.

"Thank God…we're here. Where's that B&B?"

Behold! He speaks. Sam gave him the instructions and before long we were headed to the 'cutest little B&B you'll ever see in Utah' (according to the website). The town itself was worn and faded. It was made from an old mining community that had died out shortly. The town though kept. People just moved on to form new homes in other cities, probably ones with actual stores instead of the local Thrift Store. Dean pulled into the drive was a massive three story house with white paint that was peeling. The shrubs out front were dead and one of the windows had plywood over it. I mumbled against the glass as I studied the wicked looking manor, "I'll sleep in the car."

"Think I might join you," Sam answered quietly. Dean snorted at that and shoved open his door.

"Come on, it has a certain charm to it. Sand blaster, coat of paint, and a few hanging plants…be good as new." Sam and I joined him at the trunk to get the bags. I looked at the house cautiously. '_And a few hundred pounds of salt.' _I thought softly.

Sam hefted his duffel along with mine before I could reach it and then smiled at me. I started to say something and he took off toward the front door. I glanced over at Dean who was watching me closely, "What?"

"What?"

"You've been staring at me all day. You've said less that five words to me…what?"

He squinted his eyes at me and opened his mouth then shut it as Sam gave a shout, "Ava, can you grab my backpack?"

I kept my eyes on Dean for a moment more waiting, but he shook his head and shut the trunk hard leaving me standing alone. I sighed, but recovered quickly acting as if everything was peachy keen. In my head though…I was slapping him silly.

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The keeper of the B&B was an older lady whose name was Vine, but she made it very clear to us it was pronounced _'Veen'_. Dean couldn't really pick up the concept so he just nodded and smiled while Sam put on his school boy charm. I had learned quickly that the younger ladies- Dean handled them….sometimes literally. The older ladies- Sam handled them. Breakfast was served at 7pm, _sharp_. Lunch was served at 1pm, _sharp_. Dinner was served at 7pm, _sharp_. Everything was _sharp this_ and _sharp that_. At one point I seriously thought Dean was going to strangle her.

It was starting to rain outside by the time we found our musty rooms. They looked as if they hadn't been slept in since the late seventies. My room looked as if the pink queen of roses had thrown up. I sat my duffel down on the faded cast iron bed and rolled my eyes when I heard the bed squeak. It was going to sound like I was having sex with myself every time I rolled over. The paper on the walls was rose print that matched the comforter on the bed which matched the cream color of the carpet which matched the antique cherry stained chair and table by the window. The view from the window suddenly caught my eye. I moved closer for a better view discovering that the lake was in perfect view behind the house. The eerie feeling crept up through my spine as I swallowed. I was sure it was the time of day and the rain, and the wind…but the lake was black in color. I jumped when knocked echoed through the stillness of my room. I spun around to find Sam, knuckles paused in air, his face blank. He shifted letting his hand fall, "I'm gonna pick up something to eat since we missed our allotted time for dinner."

I laughed as I crossed my arms before stepping closer to the large bed. The thing was hideous. It would most likely swallow me whole sometime during the night…I was sure it was evil. "Would you like to come?"

I met Sam's eyes and nodded, "Sure."

The less time I had to spend in this room, the better. I picked my phone off the bed along with my cigarettes from the side pocket of my duffel, "You don't mind do you?"

He shook his head. I quickly locked my door and shoved rose shaped key chain that held my room key into the pocket of my jeans. Turning to follow him down the hall way, I slowed as he paused at Dean's door. He mumbled something and closed it. I guess Dean didn't want to go, which was fine. If he didn't want to see me then I didn't want to see him either.

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We waited for our food outside of the only restaurant in town, _The Piner Miner's Café_. Thirty minutes for three cheeseburgers, three orders of fries, and three pieces of cherry pie. I hoped that _Veen_ wouldn't be too angry when she gave the mandatory cleaning tomorrow morning and found the place reeking of cheeseburgers. Burgers were not on her menu of _fine dining_. Sam and I had this small game of twenty questions going to pass the time. People eyed me suspiciously in passing as I smoked my cigarette slowly outside of the building. What? Was everyone freaking perfect here? Apparently the only place to get beer was the next town over. They didn't believe in serving it in the café. '_It makes people crazy'_ is what the waitress who took our order had said. Freaky little cute town nestled up against a demonic lake. Greatest vacation place in the world!

"Favorite toy?"

I laughed out loud flicking the smoking stick onto the ground, "Seriously? Toy?"

He grinned, "Yea, Dean and I had these army men…then these little matchbox cars. Dad was in the service and loved old cars…so yea…we both wanted to just like him."

I smiled at the thought of the two boys, young, playing with army men and cars. I shrugged in thought, "I don't know…I had a few Barbie's that Aaron used to exercise and decapitate. Didn't really have much of a girlie childhood. My nights were spent sharpening knifes at the age of six."

"Life of a hunter is fantastic," he mumbled watching an older couple cross the street.

"Um, so…why do some people call you demon boy?"

His eyes were focused on mine quickly, they were surprised, slightly tinged with fear and…shame. He shook his head and looked away, "Just some stuff in my past. I'm over that now."

"Not much of an answer," I added. _Now who was poking and prodding Ava? _He stood up and faced me, leaning in close…too close for my comfort.

"I have demon blood in me. I used to. I'm clean now," then he was darting inside the café without another word. I sucked in a breath, _demon blood_? I watched him as he paid, smiled, and took the bags. He looked normal. He seemed human. He handed me a brown bag stuffed full with wonderful smelly goodness and I hesitated. He let out an angered sigh, "I'm not going to hurt you. Trust me. Been clean for a while now- ask Dean."

I took the bag without blinking and followed slowly at his side as we headed back the B&B, "Does Bobby know?"

"He and Dean helped me detox, then I fell of the wagon, they dragged my ass back, and helped me detox again. I just trusted the wrong person. Thought I was doing the right thing…started the apocalypse. But…we fixed it. We stopped it. It's fine now." His pace quickened and I never wavered from mine. He was a good ten feet in front of me when I called out to him.

"You don't scare me Sam."

He paused and looked back at me for a few seconds. He formed a small smile and then gave a nod, "I hope I don't."

I nodded my head as I pulled him with me back to the B&B, "I promise."

"Good because I would never hurt you." I smiled and nodded once again. He met my smile equally, hopefully he trusted me enough to believe me. Sam then rolled his eyes, "I forgot drinks. Can you carry these? I'll be back within like ten minutes."

"Sure." I smiled and shuffled the bags in my arms. "See you in a bit."

The B&B was only two more blocks and I didn't mind the privacy. To be honest, I was looking for to having a room to myself. I smiled at the thought pressing on toward the creepy house.

"Ava." I turned around and was met by Sam's wide grin. He dropped a peck on the side of my cheek and lingered for a moment, "Thank you."

I couldn't form words as he backed away with this dopey smile on his face then finally turned strutting his muscles away. _Houston, we have a problem_. I closed my mouth and continued in the direction of the B&B. That…was totally unexpected.

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The calories in the bags were starting to way me down by the time I reached the second floor or maybe it was just exhaustion. I sighed and mumbled 'thank God' before knocking on the door with two knuckles. I stood, impatiently, with my head cocked to the side listening for his footsteps. Finally, I heard them. I yawned over my shoulder before he opened the door. The scary cast iron bed was calling my name. The door flew open and Dean scrunched his eyebrows oddly.

"He went to get drinks," I said before pushing my way into his room. Dean peeked out into the hallway as if he didn't believe me. I sat the food down on the table by the window with a groan. "These burgers weigh a freaking ton."

"I can't believe he left you alone," Dean growled after he closed the door, making his way to the bags of food. I shrugged and that seemed to make him even more upset. He shook his head, "I wouldn't have left you alone. We don't know what kind of a town this is."

I gave a small laugh, "Dean…I'm here, safe. Beside I can take care of myself. And look…_extra_ whipped cream on your cherry pie."

That seemed to suffice. He smiled as he opened the Styrofoam container to inspect it. I grinned as I dipped my finger into the whipped cream and stuck it in my mouth quickly. His eyes bugged out of his head, "Hey…"

I laughed, "Yep…it's good."

He sat down the container and his body was flush with my instantly, "I do believe that was _my_ whipped cream."

My gaze flickered down to his lips and I smirked, "So…you're talking to me now?"

"No," his head dipped down and his lips brushed mine before landing on them firmly. I wrapped my arms around his neck when he settled his hands on my hips. His mouth was so much warmer than mine and it was heaven…to put it simply. I could do this forever. I felt that familiar tug in the depths of my stomach and moaned before pulling back slowly. His eyes were green eyes were beautiful and hazy. "I think Sam likes you."

I stepped back suddenly, "Is that why you kissed me?"

His eyes widened, "No...no...I'm just saying…I think he likes you. You're nice to him…he doesn't get that a lot. He hasn't been with many women since his girlfriend was killed."

I cocked an eyebrow, "Are you _wanting_ me to be even nicer to him? Is that what this is about?"

"What?" He stepped forward placing his hands on my shoulders before I could run to the door. He shook his head, "No."

I shrugged him off, "You…are such a dick. You know that? If I want to be with Sam…I'll be with Sam."

"After a kiss like that…I don't think so. You want me." I shook my head and darted for the door. "You want me just as much I want you."

I paused with my hand on the door knob. _I want you_. I shivered when I felt his body heat behind me. His hand slid down mine as he pressed himself closer. His mouth hovered over my ear before pressing hot kisses onto the side of my neck. I sighed, "I don't…"

His hand slid around my waist, fingers slipped underneath my shirt, and I squeezed my eyes shut. Sam, briefly, flickered into my mind. He'd be walking through that door soon. I swallowed dryly, "I don't just have…sex randomly Dean."

He paused, only his fingers moving across my stomach, "You want a commitment."

"Is that hard to ask for?" I whispered softly as I leaned my head against the doorframe. I felt him shift behind me. He stepped away and I caught my whimper. I opened my eyes and bit my lip to keep the tears from forming.

"It is from me." He was back with my burger, fries, and pie. I took them without looking at him. I nodded as I opened the door. Sam was there. His smile faded when he saw my face.

"What's wrong?" He asked before handing the Dr Pepper to me.

I gave a small smile, "Nothing…just a headache. I'm fine Sam."

He gave a small nod as I patted him on the chest as I walked out of the room, "Night Ava."

"Night."

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To be honest, I'm not sure if I'm exactly happy with this chapter…but it's a long chapter story. So, we will have these. :-) Hopefully, ya'll will stick around for the entire thing. I have lots of future plans. Lots. :-)

Thanks for reading!


	6. Chapter 6

_**a/n: Bold italics are memories/past events**_

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"_**You were about to shoot him Aaron! The man wasn't possessed…you were about to kill an innocent man. Doesn't that bother you?" I slammed the door to the motel room we had been living in for the past three weeks. Tracking down this damn demon was harder than either of us expected. Staying in this dump was beginning to wear on both of us. I was beginning to think I was going crazy. Aaron wasn't acting like himself. It was time to call Bobby and tell him we were taking a break.**_

"_**He had information. This is how the whole interrogation process works." I watched him, my arms crossed, anger laced my tired face. He laid his 9mm and also two of his knives that he kept on his person onto the table beside the TV. He glanced up in the mirror at my reflection, "I don't know why you're upset. Dad used to do the exact same thing."**_

"_**He didn't."**_

_**He turned around with a smile on his face, "I helped Ava…trust me. Torture I can do. Daddy wasn't innocent and all righteous like you think."**_

_**I shook my head frustrated, "You are such a fucking liar. I'm so tired of this shit…what's wrong with you?"**_

_**I stepped forward and held my ground. This game that he was playing was over. We had been at each other's throats for two weeks. Cutting my losses and leaving his sorry ass here was really starting to look good. He shifted his eyes toward the door and I saw a flash of black. Black? No, it couldn't be…could it? I watched as he shoved off of the table and strolled calmly toward the door. He turned the deadbolt and locked the chain securely. My eyes flickered to the knife then back at him. He was staring at me now…eyes solid black.**_

"_**You're not Aaron," I said backing away. He smiled. I felt a shiver spread down my back. I pulled my knife from my side and with a flick of his wrist it flying. I felt my hands shaking as I fumbled on the table next to me for the bottle of holy water.**_

"_**Give the girl a prize." He picked up the knife that lay beside the tv as he neared me. It scrapped the wood making me wince. "I've been waiting forever for you to figure this out."**_

_**I picked up the bottle of holy water and threw it on him as I began reciting, "Exorcizamus te, omnis immundus spiritus omnis satanica potestas, omnis incursion…"**_

_**He laughed. He freaking laughed. He suddenly flicked his wrist again and this time I felt myself being thrown against the wall. I struggled to free myself, but froze when I felt the blade run over my chest down across my stomach, "This will be a lot of fun for me…since I have big brother watching."**_

I sat up quickly gasping for air; tears were running down my face. I quickly wiped them away as the knocking on my door continued, "Ava?"

I shoved the covers back and let out a shaky breath before opening the door. Dean had an odd look on his face. I let my eyes drop down to his bare chest as he whispered, "Are you okay? I was awake…heard you yelling…crying."

I sighed walking away toward the bed. I flipped on the light slowly as I started to question my own sanity too. No, not okay. I slouched down on the bed and let the tears roll down my face freely. Dean closed the door before joining me. "I'm okay…just a nightmare."

He nodded silently as he placed a hand on my bare shoulder. If I had known I was going to have a nightmare I would have worn more than just a spaghetti strap shirt and pair of yoga shorts. I shook my head and let out a cry, "I'm not okay…"

I leaned against him and he wrapped his arms around me tightly, "It's okay. I've got you."

"I didn't mean to kill him…I didn't mean to kill him." He rocked me as he ran his hand over my hair again and again. I shook my head, "He told me too. I didn't know what else to do. I was just doing what I was told. I didn't know…"

"You're gonna be all right." He hugged me tighter and pressed his lips to the top of my head. I could feel the tears rolling down my face and neck. I had been carrying so much guilt for my brother's death for so long. The only one that knew the whole story was Bobby. He was the one that pried the gun from my hands hours later. He was the one that cleaned me up. He was the one that cleaned up the 'mess' that I had made. He was the only one that seemed to care about me. Shawn said that I had done the one and only right thing. Kendra agreed. "Ava…"

"My brother. I killed my brother," I pushed away from him, scooting myself along the creaking bed. My eyes drifted to the hand print on his arm. I had never seen it, but I had heard Bobby mention it. I swallowed hard as I wiped at the tears harshly. I can't believe I had just cried all over him. The man who had rejected me just a few hours ago. "I'm sorry."

"Don't apologize. It's okay…we all lose it. I know, trust me."

"This is the first dream I've had in a long time, but when I do dream. His face…it's just right there." I grabbed a pillow and hugged it close to my body. I shook my head, "I just can't get rid of the look he gave me before and then after…his eyes…"

Dean sighed heavily as he rubbed his forehead and ran his hand over his hair frustrated like. He turned sideways facing me. The bed creaked under his weight. He took in a breath, "Tell me. It helps to talk about it. I used to…talk about things with someone and it helped a lot. She listened…and for a little bit, it felt like someone cared enough. It helps."

I cocked an eyebrow, "A girly moment from Mr. Dean Winchester. Shock me."

He smirked, "It's harder than it looks being me."

I gave a small smile and shook me head before the memory fully sunk in. I took in a breath, "We…were tracking down a demon in Chicago. It was killing people for fun…just picking them off one by one. So…we went in looking for it. I'm not exactly sure when…but it got Aaron somehow. I didn't even notice….for two whole weeks. Not once. How can you not know?"

Dean met my eyes briefly and they flickered down to the rose printed comforter, I continued, "I figured it out…his attitude was off. Then I caught a glimpse of his eyes. He trapped me in the room…we were there for hours and hours. He said that he was excited because my brother could watch. His eyes…its eyes…God, they are like freaking burned into my brain. He smiled the whole time…he cut…burned…and touched…"

Dean sucked in a breath as he looked away. I wiped away some stray tears and then gave a sad laugh, "I got away…started heading for the door. He stabbed me in the arm. I knew I was dead, but I remembered that I had placed a gun under the bed when we had first arrived at the hotel. I darted for it. I turned around and there he was. Aaron…"

Dean met my eyes…they were soft, glassy. He swallowed as he twirled his ring absentmindedly. "That's the thing I can't forget, you know? Aaron was there for a few seconds. He told me….he told me to. He said, 'Shoot, baby bird.' Then just like that, black, and I shot. Bobby had to pry the gun from my hands hours later. I just sat there…staring at his eyes. I couldn't move. I had just killed the only thing…the only person that cared for me."

"That's why you hunt?"

I met his eyes and gave a swift nod, "I owe it to him."

"I think you owe yourself," I looked away. The bed creaked once more as he moved closer. I felt his hands on the side of my face drawing my eyes toward him. "Closure isn't something earned while hunting. It's gained over time."

He pressed a kiss to my forehead and my eyes fluttered involuntarily. Damn eyes. He wasn't in this for a commitment. He was being a friend. I opened my eyes and he was watching me. Suddenly he pressed a soft kiss to my lips and then pulled away quickly, "You're strong Ava. I know what strong looks like and you're gonna be fine."

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The next day would have been completely fine if Sam hadn't walked in and found Dean in my bed with his arm around my waist. The look on Sam's face was like his puppy had been slaughtered in some cruel way. The look on Dean's face…was pretty funny actually. I know for a fact that we hadn't meant to fall asleep and another fact, we didn't fall asleep with his arm around my waist either. Sam, after that, went out to get us all coffee and bagels. I hated bagels, but I wasn't about to say different. He already seemed wounded enough. It wasn't as if anything was going between Dean and me…or even between Sam and me. I think it was more of a thing like 'why didn't you tell me?'

I met the boys in Sam's room, newly showered and fully dressed in jeans with my Ariat boots, and a plain cranberry colored scoop neck tee. I was going comfortable today. If we were going to scout out the land and around the lake- I was going comfortable. Kendra was more of the girly girl than I was. Don't get me wrong, I loved my dresses and skirts, but never while hunting on the road. Those were for off time. My off time clothes were stashed in my Jeep at Bobby's right now.

Dean seemed to be eyeing me more today than he usually did. To be honest, I wasn't sure if it was because of what I divulged to him last night or the way we were found sleeping. Maybe a bit of both. Sam pointed to the edge of the map that showed Piner Springs.

"Thought maybe we could search the old mine…seems like a good place to stash bodies."

"My vote's on the lake," Dean said chewing his lip. Sam crossed his arms and huffed loudly and gave a short nod.

"The natural spring runs from the mine to the lake. We split up. Check things out."

Split up. Well, there were three of us…and I certainly didn't split into. I raised my hand, "I don't come in halves…so where am I splitting to?"

"The town…safer." I met Dean's _gorgeous_ green eyes with surprised ones. He seriously was going to play the safe card with me? Sam swiftly agreed. I gaped at them. Dean shrugged, "Still have the town to scout right? That's your job."

"Give the easy job to the chic huh?"

Dean rolled his eyes, "I _really_ don't want to play the gender card with you Ava."

Sam chimed in as he began loading things into his backpack, "I am…it's safer. You have the town."

"Not helping man."

I glared at both of them, "Fine. Whatever."

I snatched the visitor pamphlets off the table next to the map and grabbed my coffee, "For the record…I hate bagels."

I left.

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The town was extremely small, so there wasn't much to 'scout' out. That must have been their plan that they were whispering about ruthlessly before I walked in. I hoped the boys were having fun on their hikes while I scared away the fishy looking townsfolk of Piner Springs. I rolled my eyes as another woman crossed the street before she got within twenty feet of me. Seriously? Some say that this is natural and it's fine to cross the street, but when she stares you down like you are some kind of dangerous convict…then it's not natural.

I spotted _Veen_ walking across the street in high stride, keys in hand, face looking treacherous. I gave a _hmm_ and hauled ass to catch up with her. "Hey Vine!"

She turned abruptly, "Ms. Granger….without the company of your gentlemen friends I see."

Granger…my cover name. Dean's was Hightower. Sam's was Peterson. We sounded like real people, almost. I smiled softly, "Ohh…they're out doing guy things, hiking and such. I'm shopping."

She glanced down at my hands, my empty hands. Her eyes flicked over to the side of the street then back at me, "I own an antique shop….if you enjoy that sort of thing."

Hate it. "Love antiquing."

I found myself following the older woman to her shop. There were quite a few strands of hair hanging out of her bun. There was also quite a bit of gray hair on the back of her black shirt. There was a run in her hose that was very noticeable as she walked at a quick pace. Her knuckles were almost white as she griped the handles of her bamboo purse. Something was wrong with the B&B/Antique Store owner. She opened the door to the store, allowing me to go first, then she entered and flipped the CLOSED /OPEN sign around, "I have an enjoyable piece I think you will be quite interested in Ms…"

"Granger. Ava."

"Yes. You were making quite a racket this morning. Sounds like the bed was going to come through my ceiling. He must be a stallion."

I felt my heart stop. I've been wondering that myself the last few days. "That…was just me. I'm a tosser and turner…"

She cackled and then disappeared into the back. The lights flickered on and I heard her calling out, "Browse around. I'll be out in a sec."

I nodded and glanced around at the creepy antiques. I'm not really sure what I was looking for. Sam had sent me a text just after I left and said to keep my eye out for cursed items. I'm not an expert, but I'm pretty sure that these things don't have a sign saying, 'I'm evil.'

On the third isle I was in, the lights flickered…my heart raced. I turned around to make a dash for the door, but was stopped by _Veen_. A scarier version of _Veen_ with black eyes…shit, shit, shit. I turned the other way quickly and made a dash for the exit. I caught a glimpse of Sam and Dean standing on the other side of the street talking closely.

"Dean!"

I was unexpectedly tossed in the air back toward shelves. I crashed to the ground with a cry and a sharp pain in my hand. I laid there dazed for a second. My vision swam around me. I could hear Sam and Dean beating on the door, trying to break the glass. Black eyes filled my vision and I jerked away. _Veen_ cocked her head as she towered over me, eyes black as coal, "I believe we've been in this position before Ava."

My eyes widened and I scrambled toward the door once again. "Dean! It's him! Dean!"

His face hardened as he pulled out his gun and started shooting the glass, to no avail. I could feel the tears rolling down my cheeks as I was raised into the air, "Come now Ava…we had fun. Did we not?"

I shifted my eyes to Dean and Sam. They were gone. No…I was alone. He was going to kill me and I was alone. "Did you enjoy the dreams? I couldn't believe it was you when you walked in…it was like it was meant to be."

I flew back into another wall of antiques, my head thumped against the wall sending white spots into my vision. I pulled a glass shard from my forearm. I heard banging once more. I rolled my head toward the door and found Dean there hand pressed against the glass, "You're okay. You're gonna be all right."

I swallowed before hearing shots ring out into the room. Black smoke poured out of _Veen's _mouth and I watched the body fall to the ground. Dean was there in seconds, hands on either side of my face forcing me to look at him. His concerned eyes were glassy and I wanted so bad to throw my arms around him, but I couldn't lift them. So, all I said was…"Safer, huh?"

He smirked and pressed a long kiss to my forehead.

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After the shop incident, we high tailed it out of there. We took only the back roads until we reached a town eighty miles away. We stopped at this crap whole of a motel to clean up and rest, try to figure out our next course of action. Now…I was in the bathroom for almost thirty minutes (I think) letting the water run over my head. I watched the blood from my right forearm run down the tub and swirl around the drain. He remembered me. Of course he would…why wouldn't he? I had escaped him once, now twice. I had to think that the third time- I wouldn't be so lucky. I sighed when the water started to run cold and reached up to turn it off quickly. It was then I heard Dean's voice. I lifted myself from the tub and pressed my ear to the door.

'_This is pretty bad Bobby.'_

…

'_I know…I know. If Sam hadn't been able to get in…I don't…'_

…

'_Yea, I think we are gonna head your way for a bit.'_

I slumped down on the floor. I sat there for the longest time before my body started to shiver and I felt my hair start to dry. The wound on my arm had stopped bleeding. The puddle of blood looked scary in contrast to the white grimy tiles. The last thing I remember was Dean wrapping a towel around me, pressing a kiss to my forehead before he carried me to the bed.

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_**Everyone who is reading- you are all so awesome! I'm going to try to get as many chapters in as I can because I'm leaving for two weeks to go on vacation on the 18th. So, we will see how many I can get out here.**_

_***cyber cookies for everyone***_

_**:-)**_


	7. Chapter 7

**_Just wanna say that ya'll are the most awesome readers...in the world. _**

**_:)_**

**_Enjoy._**

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Sam and Dean seemed to think I was going to break, which in all honestly was probably true. I hadn't said much to the guys since we started out on our maiden voyage to Bobby's. I wasn't completely enthusiastic about going back because I knew what would happen. Bobby would wrap me up in a huge warm hug, he would ask me if I was okay, and then he would scold me for not staying with one of the guys. They kind of ditched me…so not really my fault this time.

The two men were sitting in the front seat, quiet for the most part. Dean was humming Metallica, per usual. Sam was reading some new book he had bought, about revenge demons. I don't think that he tracked me down. I just happen to run on to him. Which was a complete coincidence really, trust me. I had no intentions of ever wanting to see him…again. I flipped my journal to the page I had marked, the page I knew so well, I could almost recite it from memory.

_March 4__th__, 2009_

'_He who seeks evil will find it'_

_It's been four months since I killed Aaron, not the demon, but Aaron. I can't help but think about it constantly. It haunts me. I've finally left Bobby's…which he won't know until he gets home from a hunt with Rufus. I'm going to find the demon and kill him. If I die in the process of this, that suits me fine. It's my fault he's dead. I intend to make the demon pay for what he did._

'_He who seeks evil will find it'_

_Mom used to say this phrase every time we would go out to a hunt. Dad would roll his eyes and Aaron would laugh. I shivered because I knew something evil waited for me. Waited to kill me. I told my dad that one time. That I was scared that something evil would kill me. You know what he told me, 'Kill it first baby bird.'_

_And that's what I intend to do…_

_His name is Gavin and I know exactly where to find him._

"Hey, you okay?" I looked up at Sam and nodded. We had stopped at a gas station to fill up. Dean was leaning against my door, hands in pockets, perfect rounded jeans pressed against the window. I rolled my eyes. Sam coughed as he pointed at the journal, "What you reading?"

I sighed softly as I traced the lines in the words I had written so long ago still remembering when I had penned them. Sadly, I was more afraid of this demon now than I ever had been, "Just remembering something I promised myself I'd do."

Dean knocked on the window, "Need anything?"

I shook my head and looked back down at my journal as I turned the page. I felt Sam watching me, maybe afraid to ask what my promise was. Nevertheless, he said nothing and turned around slowly with a frown.

_June 24__th__, 2009_

_I found him._

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Arriving at Bobby's was just as suspected. After giving me a hug, inspecting my injuries, scolding me for not being more cautious- he told me he was glad I was with the living still. Shortly thereafter, he scolded Dean and Sam for what seemed like hours while I carried my bag to the spare room I always slept in and collapsed on the bed in exhaustion. I clutched the journal close to my chest as I listened to them yell at one another. I rubbed the tape that was wrapped around three of my fingers on my left hand. The ring finger had been dislocated at the knuckle. Doctor Sam fixed me. I smirked at the smiley face he had drawn on the tape. He should have been a doctor. He probably still could if he wanted. I was sure that the dedication to Bobby and Dean weighed more heavily on his mind than a career ever did or even will. I really couldn't blame them, if I could do it over again…I would have chose family over myself.

My eyes rose to the figure looming in the doorway. He smiled as he shifted the cap on his head, "You look like you're doing fine."

"I think you said that same thing to me after Aaron died and that situation turned out wonderful."

He sighed as he moved to the edge of the bed, sitting down heavily on the end of it. He tilted his head, "Dean mentioned that you told him what had happened."

He shifted his eyes toward me as I remained silent. He gave a few quick swift nods, "That's good…Dean's….Dean's a good listener. Been through a lot himself you know."

"Bobby…" I sighed before closing my eyes and shaking my head.

"No, you listen here. There will be no running off to God knows where this time. You will stay here with people that care about you. We will find this damn demon and kill the hell out of him. You aren't doing that by yourself this time. And you will eat something, you're too damn skinny. I don't like it." I had to smile at the gruffness in his voice. I sat the journal aside and crawled up next to him. I kissed him on the cheek and then leaned my head on his shoulder. He reminded me so much of my dad…I think that was why I kept coming back to Bobby's to begin with.

"I actually meant…don't try to set me up."

He grunted, "You aren't dating Dean. Ever."

I straightened myself, "Excuse me?" Yep, just like my dad.

"Nope. No hunters."

"Bobby…" My life. Hello?

"Nope." His face was stern. I knew he was serious.

"Not that I want to…" I shrugged looking down at my hands. Bobby grew still next to me. His face solemn as he kept his eyes trained on me carefully.

"Oh Lord," with that he stood up and trudged out the door and down the stairs hollering for Dean. I smiled brightly. I guess I could handle a few restful days at Bobby's.

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I always loved the way the stars looked at Bobby's. I also loved the way they looked from the roof. That's where I found myself a few hours after me and Bobby's 'talk'. I had a beer in hand and a blanket over my legs while sitting on the roof _pretending_ to count the stars. I started to wonder if Castiel could tell me how many there were exactly. I heard the window to my bedroom open and I said sighed into my bottle. Well, here we go…another lecture from Bobby.

"What the hell are you doing out here?" Dean. Better than Bobby, although, I was pretty sure he was the one that told Dean where I was.

"Enjoying the stars," I said with a smirk. "And the quiet."

He squinted his eyes at me. "Well, think I might join you. Something to get away from Bobby's twenty questions of my intentions toward you."

I spit my beer out onto my blanket, "Sorry…."

He shrugged a shoulder and leaned a little further out of the window looking around. I patted the spot next to me, "Come on out. You can share your intentions with me."

He smirked and God, it was gorgeous. "That's sounds…very kinky."

He handed his beer to me and I smiled trying to contain my laughter. Watching him trying to maneuver himself out the window, it was beyond hilarious, "Guess you haven't climbed through any girls windows in a while huh?"

I laughed when he about fell, he gave me a finger. "You know how old I am? This is difficult to do."

"You're not that old and you know…little bit of Yoga…you'll be all limber. Be like a monkey or something."

He gave me a reproachful look and then I shook my head. I closed my eyes briefly, "I'm sorry. Right…Sam told me about…geez. I'm sorry."

I handed him his beer before taking a swig of mine. Stupid mouth. Sam told me the story about the _she that shall not be named _in front of Dean. Apparently, he had the tendency to sull up and not speak to you if you did. There was still some controversy as to if he was still in love with her or not. This bothered me somewhat, even though I know it shouldn't have, because we weren't together. The thing was is that I wanted to _be together_ with Dean. I just wasn't sure if that was going to happen with him. Dean tended to be a wild card and a drifter. I was positive he could be something more, but after his experiences with 'Yoga Chic', I was also positive that family life or even a committed relationship was out of the question.

"Don't worry about it." He shrugged as he moved closer to me. He sighed contently as he gazed up at the stars. I watched as his face suddenly became pained, "I couldn't give her what she wanted…I tried to quit, but…it's like you said. I don't know how to be good at anything else. I failed her…failed Ben."

"That doesn't mean you are always going to fail, Dean. You just find a way to juggle it. Life and hunting. You shouldn't give up something you love…you should work at it, work for it. It just won't spontaneously happen. And besides…if she loved you enough, she wouldn't have asked you to quit in the first place."

He was watching me closely, I felt self-conscious of what I was saying. Maybe I sounded like some kind of twit. I was just going off what my parents had told me when I was a teenager. Their twenty-three years of marriage behind their belt. Add on the hunting, danger, stress, financial issues, and two children to raise- I thought they did an excellent job. As a hunter, you wonder how life will be for you…if you will have a family or even reliable friends. Most of your friends though, are either your close family or the people you hunt with. Right now, my best friends were Kendra and Bobby….the list was starting to widen a bit now. I liked that. I felt a little less alone in the world.

"Do you want a normal life?"

My startled eyes met his. A normal life? He was asking me a question. A serious question and I didn't even know how to answer it. Was there a right or wrong answer? What was a normal life anyways? To me, now, this was a normal life. The teenager in me...didn't think so, but I wasn't a teenager anymore was I? I shrugged under his watchful eyes, "I'm not sure what a normal life is. This is normal…for me."

"You don't want kids?" He said looking down at his hands somewhat…disappointed, maybe?

I smiled slightly, "Of course I want kids. When I was five weeks old, my mom already had me on a hunt. I don't know anything else. My children will definitely be able to hunt…take care of themselves, you know?"

His eyes seemed to dance in the moonlight as he smirked. I was just rambling on and on and he was letting me. Great Ava, you're gonna scare the man off. He shook his head, "I don't know. I don't know if I want my kids exposed to all of this. I'm not sure if I want my kids to be dragged around the states…living in and out of motels. That life sucked for me when I was a kid."

I nodded, "Yea, me too."

It fell silent between us for a while. The crickets seemed to grow louder by the second. The stars were twinkling brighter as the night went on. The breeze was cool enough I pulled the blanket tighter. My beer was completely empty now. Dean's was almost empty also. He didn't bring a reserve, so I figured this was a _relaxing_ beverage before bed. The thought of bed was beginning to sink heavily into my muscles and bones. "Unless…you had…like a home base or something. Some place that you always came back to. The one place you could always call home. Just leave the kids with someone or somewhere that you knew that they would be protected."

I nodded slowly thinking about his words. I smirked, "Like a 'Bobby's Home Base'?"

He laughed, "Can you see Bobby changing diapers?"

I grinned in return and bumped my shoulder to his, "Maybe one day…you'll get to."

He smiled at me and my eyes froze on his. He was slowly moving closer and I licked my lips, involuntarily, of course. I smirked and closed the distance. His lips moved over mine smoothly and soon I was deepening the kiss. I heard his beer bottle clank against the gutter as he discarded it. He pressed the full length of his body against mine and wrapped his arms around me. The blanket between us was suddenly too much fabric, I struggled to remove it. He broke free from the kiss, grabbed it, and tossed it next to me. The sudden gust of cool night air made me gasp and shiver, I felt a few _places_ harden on both of us. His warm hands found their way under my shirt as his lips found the, _oh yea,_ places on my neck. I moaned and bucked my hips up to meet his and he groaned as he began to grind his hips against me. I whined as I sucked on his ear, "God…Ava."

Dean's hand was underneath my shirt, fingers playing with my left nipple as he continued to grind against me. I moaned his name and he kissed me softly in response. His hand started to trail down to my jeans, I felt my breath catch, my head was spinning.

"Dean, I need to speak with you."

Dean jerked up and I screamed, 'Holy hell'. I quickly grabbed Dean to stabilize him before he fell off the roof, "What the hell Cas? We're kinda busy!"

"My apologies. This is important."

I sighed, "Thanks for the mini heart attack."

Cas scrunched his eyebrows in confusion and then looked back at Dean, "I'll wait for you…inside."

He was gone. Dean closed his eyes as he let his body sink back to mine. He sighed, "Sometimes…"

"We'll pluck his wings off later. You better go and see what the lone ranger wants."

He chuckled before he gave me a deep toe curling kiss, that almost convinced me to delay this meeting, but I knew if the Angel called, then it was _imperative_. I sighed as he suddenly enveloped me in a tight hug, "I've gotta go. We'll…I'll see you later."

"Kinda hard to miss you in the same house you know," I said massaging his bicep muscles. Boy oh boy did I want those wrapped around me. I smiled as he rolled his eyes. He kissed my forehead.

"Be careful out here by yourself," then he was inside the window and I was here, alone. I sucked in a breath. I touched my lips absentmindedly and I felt my eyelids flutter closed. My heart fluttered and my abdomen burned. I longed for him to be back, here, with me, on top of me. I swallowed dryly, I knew I was doomed. This was just the beginning…I could feel it.

I smiled and resumed my task of counting the stars.

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**_So...what did you think? _**

**_:)_**

**_I think I'm going to get at least 2 more chapters out before my vacation. Of course, who knows, might come back with like a zillion chapters after my vacation. hehe_**


	8. Chapter 8

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As it turns out, I wouldn't be seeing him later. In fact, I now stood by the door watching the guys pack their things. Special orders from Castiel apparently meant that I couldn't accompany them. Cas stood in the corner eyeing me carefully. I sighed in frustration under his watchful glare and whirled around taking off toward the kitchen. It was three in the morning and I knew that the guys would want coffee for the road. Hell, I even wanted some, because I knew I wasn't going to be able to sleep knowing that they were out there on a _mission impossible_ as Dean called it. When Dean said _mission impossible_ it absolutely terrified me. I pulled the coffee can down from the top shelf and started tossing heaps of grounds into the filter. I shook my head as I snatched the pot off of the older than time coffee machine and filled it with water.

"You shouldn't worry. They will be fine."

I turned my head toward the trench coated angel…_him_ again. I gave a sarcastic laugh and then went back to my task, "Yea…that's what my dad before they died. _'We will be fine on our own baby bird. Don't you worry.'_ And that…yea."

He didn't reply. I pushed the 'ON' button violently and turned around. I crossed my arms defensively, "In fact…my brother said the same thing before he was possessed by a demon. I'm tired of the word fine. You're throwing it out like it's freaking candy."

"I understand your frustration…"

"No…no you don't," I blinked back tears turning my back to him I reached for a coffee mug from the cabinet. I sat the mug down hard on the counter. "Please leave me alone."

He let out a hard breath as I had seen him do before with Dean. Usually when Dean had made him angry. "As I said before, I understand your frustration. The past was fated Ava. Otherwise you wouldn't be here, where you are today. It was meant to be this way."

I planted my hands flat and firmly on the cool counter. I squeezed my eyes shut and shook my head persistently, "Look…I don't know if you know me or not, but I'm…I'm not this…amazing person okay. I'm not sure what master plan is in store for me. Do you know what I've done? I'm pretty sure I'm not exactly favored."

"You are not the first to make a deal with a demon. Ask Dean."

I turned on my heel and he was already gone. I wiped away my tears quickly upon hearing Dean and Sam approaching the kitchen. I smiled brightly, too brightly, when they stepped through the door, "Coffee for the road?"

He smirked, "Sure."

Dean met my eyes. He squinted slightly trying to read me, "Yeah. Hey Sam, you wanna grab those…shells…from the basement."

Sam shifted his gaze between Dean and me before I turned around quickly and began to prepare their thermoses. Sam gave a soft 'yeah' and then his footsteps promptly faded away. Dean crossed his arms as he leaned against the counter, "Saw Cas follow you in here. He…upset you?"

I didn't answer as I tapped my fingers impatiently on the counter waiting for the coffee to finish. He sighed heavily and then shoved his hands in his pockets as he shifted against the counter, "I can talk to him…if you want. He sometimes doesn't get the whole human interaction thing."

"Yeah, I caught on to that." I nodded and whispered softly, "He mentioned you made a deal with a demon. What was it?"

I was met by silence. I glanced sideways at him and his face had hardened, his eyes were distant as he stared at the floor. At that moment I realized he probably never wanted me to know about the deal. I bit my tongue while I shifted my gaze down to his chest.

"You weren't planning on telling me, where you?" I raised my eyes to meet his. They were confused, shocked, angry…sad. He scrunched his eyebrows at me and then shook his head muttering something about Cas.

He swallowed hard, "It was to save Sam. It's over now…happened a long time ago."

"What were the circumstances?"

He shoved off the counter and leaned closer, "I didn't want you to know. I still don't. I'm…I'm not right because of it, okay. It screwed with me…mentally. I just…I can't. This is why I can't have normal relationships."

"Seriously? That's your excuse?" He gave a rough sigh and plopped down in the chair behind him. He lowered his head to rest in his hands.

"You wouldn't understand."

"I made a deal once." His head popped up, his eyes were huge laced with…fear? I knelt down in front of him and gathered his hands in mine. "The deal…consisted of me leading three people to their deaths in exchange for the lives of my brother and my parents. I tricked those people, hunters, into their deaths."

He opened his mouth then closed it quickly after I continued, "The deal didn't work because…one escaped. And…I live with that every day, what I've done. I'm responsible for those two innocent people. I've done terrible things Dean…and I can still do this. Us."

I caressed his face gently and wiped a few stray tears that had fallen onto his cheeks. He looked me directly in the eye and then whispered flatly, "I was sent to Hell for four months."

I felt my jaw drop slightly. There it was the dreaded secret he had been keeping from me. The one thing that made him not want to open up completely to me. It was the reason why he didn't want to be in a relationship with me. Was he afraid that the truth would hurt me? Or was he afraid that he would hurt me? I swallowed and pulled my jaw up tightly shaking my head, "Doesn't matter. Screwed up or not. I'll love you anyways."

His head jerked slightly surprised by my declaration, "She said that too, you know."

I shook my head slowly as I caressed his rough cheek, "Yeah, but I'm not her. Never will be Dean."

He attacked my lips with a hard kiss. I felt him smile against my lips and I had to laugh. His arms wrapped around my waist and he hoisted me up into his lap. Warmth spread through my body as his hands tangled in my hair. I could definitely love this man forever. If…this was love. I was pretty sure this was what it felt like. My mom and dad had told me they fell fast and hard and that they were glad they did. Mom said it was the best whirlwind romance, ever. I guess, like parents…like daughter?

He sighed against my skin as he pressed his forehead against mine, "I have to go. Me and Sammy have a lead on something huge. Something…dangerous. I can't watch you, him, and Bobby at the same time. I wouldn't be able to protect…"

"I know…its okay." I smiled as I ran my fingers thru his hair. "I understand. Just please be careful."

He kissed me on the cheek, millimeters from my lips and I felt my stomach twist with excitement. He excited me, he made me feel like there was something to hold on for…he made me feel everything, "Bobby is gonna stay here with you. Make sure you're safe."

I sighed turning my head away from his concerned eyes. I hated it when someone felt responsible for me. It would always end messy after that. He began to rub my shoulder, "This demon may actually get what he wants this next time. I can't be out there doing my job...worrying about you Ava."

I kissed his lips quickly to stop him from talking, "Just concentrate on you. Okay. Back in one piece. Understand?"

He grinned and gave a small solute, "Yes Ma'am."

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The _mission impossible_ scenario was taking longer than the guys had expected. I was stuck here with Bobby. Not that I minded, sometimes. I think it was beginning to get to him though. I had cleaned every nook and cranny of the house during the past three days. He would go along behind me putting things back in their _proper_ place. He said that he wouldn't be able to find anything if I moved them. Of course he wouldn't be able to…some of those things hadn't been moved in ten years. I was going nuts being cooped up in this house. Almost two day had gone by and Dean hadn't called…Sam included. Of course, Bobby said they were okay and not to worry. Right…

Bobby wouldn't let me leave the house or surrounding _junk_ yard area. The only thing that came close to work was helping Bobby with research. He was doing research on a few _creepers_ for fellow hunters. When I would try to help him with the file labeled "**P**", he would go crazy on me. This…brings up the reason why I'm sneaking down the stairs right now. I'm snooping, for investigative purposes.

Houses seemed to creak more at night especially when you're trying to creep into the study. I paused in the doorway giving my eyes time to adjust to the moonlight room. The file had to be somewhere on the desk, it was the last place I had seen before going to bed. Tiptoeing to the desk I glanced around once more before I opened the desk drawers as slowly as I could without alerting Bobby where I was. I couldn't recall seeing him put the file away, but it wasn't on his desk anymore. I sighed as I turned around and began rummaging through the stack of books behind the desk. He had to have hid it knowing I was interested in it. He wasn't stupid, but neither was I. Give me enough time, I'll find it.

"What are you doing?"

I squeaked and jumped sending a stack of books to the ground. Noise filtered through the house and I cringed inwardly. Cas stood like a statue, eyes firm on me, judging me silently. I shook my head, "Trying to find something. Can I help you?"

I began picking the books back up quietly. I hadn't heard anything from Bobby, yet, but that didn't mean he wasn't getting his _demon killing kit_ together. Also, I really didn't need him mad at me considering we were locked in the same prison for God knows how long…alone. "You are looking for a file."

"Like I said before, can I help you?" Damn nosey Angel. I turned with my hands on my hips. I kept my voice even and soft, but stern. His eyes squinted for three seconds then changed rather quickly as he dropped the whole questioning process.

"I need your help with something." Well, that was a 180. His eyes were slightly soft in his request. I decided not to fall for the sad Angel look. Nope.

"Well, that's a change…since I can't hunt tell me what I can do? Polish your freaking wings for…" I trailed off when movement behind him caught my eye. Kendra stepped out in the moonlight that filled the study. She leaned against the wall, arms crossed, and her pink and camo duffel bag at her feet. Her face was puffy, eyes red, make up was long gone. Her hair was place haphazardly in a ponytail. She hugged her jacket closer and stared at the ground absently. Something was wrong, very wrong. Where was Shawn? I shifted my eyes back to Cas and he shook his head.

"Ken…" I stepped forward and Cas stopped me. "I healed her…physically. She will need counseling from you in this matter. The demon was most…"

"Gavin," I breathed out heavily. "Is…he dead?"

He looked away. I could see regret and conviction in his eyes, "Hardly. I need to get back to Dean and Sam. I trust you will handle this."

I stared at him bewildered. As if I could just snap my fingers and suddenly everything be fine. I nodded regardless of what I was thinking. I moved my eyes to Kendra just as he disappeared. She looked frail. I reached my hand out to her and she moved like lightening into my arms and cried.

"He's dead. He's dead. He's dead." Her body shook as her knees gave way and I had no choice but to follow her down with a hard thump to the ground. In a few seconds I knew Bobby would come bursting through the study door with a shotgun ready to blast heads, but I couldn't move myself. I couldn't even speak. I just held my dear cousin, rocking her back and forth as she wept in my arms. The lights flew on and I raised my eyes to meet Bobby's. His gaze swept over Kendra and then down to her bag. He shook his head slightly and made his way to the kitchen. I assumed coffee was going to be brewing in a few minutes. Any chance of sleeping had gone.

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Kendra sat at the table, long pale fingers wrapped around the brown coffee cup, her face blotchy from crying. Bobby took a breath and ran his hand over his head. There were few times in my knowing Bobby that I had ever seen him without a ball cap on. I guess 4am was a good enough excuse as any. When Aaron and I were taken in by Bobby, it took five months for me to see him without a cap on and even then it was strange to me. Sort of like now…he reminded me of my father and to be honest, I wasn't sure how I felt about that.

"It was this demon, Gavin, right?" Kendra nodded quickly, parts of her curly hair falling from her ponytail. I sighed. Bobby stood up suddenly with his coffee cup. "You sure?"

"Bobby…" I began and he cut me off.

"We need to be sure. If he's tracking everyone down that you know…we have to be damn sure it's Gavin."

Kendra scoffed, "This is your fault you know."

I felt my jaw go slack…she had no right to say that to me, but God, she was right. "Kendra…I'm so sorry about your dad. This demon…he's…he doesn't let something go and I'm that something."

"Then you should have died," she spat out. Her beautiful blue eyes cold from hate.

"Kendra!" Bobby hissed out. I shook my head feeling my heart break. I placed a hand on Bobby's arm and gave him a nod to leave. He hesitated momentarily then moved out of the room.

"Ken…I don't know what to say…I'm just so…"

"He wanted me to give you a message," she interrupted.

I rested my hand on her forearm encouraging her to continue. Her blue eyes landed on my hand then back up to meet my brown eyes. We were so opposite, but we were almost the same. Her blue eyes hardened, they held no emotion, just anger, "He said third times a charm. And he knows where you ran off to."

I jerked my hand away and stood up so quickly that I knocked the chair over. I shook my head and headed for the stairs. Bobby called out after me and I ignored him. I needed to get out of here before he came for me. If I kept moving, it would make it harder. Staying in one place…now that was dangerous. I was so stupid for staying here so long. I should have known better. I slammed the door and jerked my duffel out from under the bed. I wasn't sure what I was packing, all I know I was throwing clothes into my bag, folded-unfolded, dirty-clean, and it didn't matter. The sooner I left the better.

"You shouldn't leave."

"Holy shit!" I jerked around to see Cas was standing like a perfect little soldier. I laid my hand over my heart willing it to slow down, "No…he's coming. I have to leave. If I don't everyone is in danger."

"Dean and Sam are downstairs. You need to stay where Dean can protect you."

I snorted and shook my head as I continued my packing. He was crazy. Dean couldn't protect me. Sam couldn't. Bobby couldn't. No one can. I'm the only one that's ever survived him, that's beat him, twice. And now he's coming after me to finish the job because that pisses him off.

"If you leave Dean's future will suffer." I shut my eyes at his vague words. Of course it would. There it was the one reason that would keep me from leaving, Dean. Images flooded my mind of us kissing, laughing, and smiling…us. I shook my head and continued to throw things in my duffel. "He won't find another. Neither will you."

"And that would be so bad?" I mumbled softly. Never having to worry about one another. Never having to look out for one another. Never having to feel the pain when we lost one another. Which pain would be worse? Leaving him or loosing him? Either way…I would never see him again.

The door to my room opened and Dean popped in. His jacket and hair was wet, I could smell the rain on him, "It's going to be fine."

I laughed bitterly, "Of course it is."

His hand landed on mine as I started to zip the duffel up, "You aren't leaving. You need to stay. What about Kendra?"

I looked at the door unsure. Kendra had just lost her father. Given he was a complete asshole, but she had just lost the closest blood she had. I was the only actual 'family' she had left. I couldn't protect her and myself from this demon. Besides, at the moment, I was pretty sure she hated my guts. "What about me?"

My eyes flickered to his and Cas left abruptly. He stepped closer and lifted my hand off the duffel, "I thought you said you can handle this?"

"I don't recall saying 'this' specifically." He smirked and kissed me suddenly. My eyes shut and for a split second I felt normal. I felt like a normal woman kissing her normal _friend_ during a normal moment. I broke away and let out a breath, "Cas said that you could protect me. I just don't think…"

"Don't. Don't think…don't worry," He swallowed as he pulled me into him. His wet clothes seeping into mine, but I had never felt so warm. So…loved. I could hear the thunder rumble, the lightening crack in the background. I felt my spine shiver and my heart slow to a comfortable pace, "Even if I have to crawl back into Hell. He's not getting you."

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Thanks for reading! :-)


	9. Chapter 9

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_November_

Kendra was beginning to come around…slowly. Well, honestly, she wasn't speaking to me or even Dean, but at least she wasn't cussing me every time she saw me. So, that was an improvement. She blamed me for her father's death- I knew that to be a fact. Dean though…well, no one would explain to me how exactly Shawn _died._ I finally caught Dean one evening laying on top of the hood of the Impala drinking a pack of beer, by himself, looking all droopy eyed and vulnerable. He told me then that he had killed Shawn as a last resort. It was the only way to save Kendra. She had watched, in shock, as Dean stabbed Shawn in the throat. Gruesome enough as it was, Shawn lived long enough to tell Kendra he was sorry.

After that Dean asked me if I ever got tired of killing. I couldn't answer him honestly, so I just remained quiet, letting him talk it out. That's what scared me…the fact that I couldn't say I hated it.

Was I addicted to killing? Did I like it? Maybe, I don't know. It made me feel…relieved...somehow. To make matters worse, that was all I could think of during Thanksgiving dinner, but I wasn't the only one distracted. Dean was pushing his food around on his plate, which was odd enough. Bobby chewed his food so slowly that I was sure that he would still be eating during Christmas. Kendra was all cozy with Sam because…well, he was the only one that hadn't offended or hurt her in some way. Cas was there too, even though he doesn't eat. I still set him a place at the table because I wanted him to feel comfortable and welcome. Dean mentioned at one point that Cas was like his brother. So, family had to be present for family meals, even if he never ate. He kept reminding me of the fact that he didn't eat, constantly. I'm sure it was Dean's coaching because Cas would say, 'I'm sorry I'm not eating. I'm not hungry. No thank you.' Then he would glance at Dean and he would nod. That made me laugh.

After dinner, my expectations were met, everyone split leaving me with the dishes. I didn't think everyone would want to stick around like a family and clean up the table, then play games afterward. I remembered doing that when my parents and brother were still alive. We tried to maintain the normality of a family as much and often as we could. In the far future, when I have children, I wanted to do the same because I knew that my life wouldn't change. My life would be their life. Once a hunter…always a hunter. There wasn't exactly a retirement plan with this occupation.

"Need some help?"

I glanced over to see Dean leaning against the doorway, right foot crossed in front of the left, beer in his left hand, right hand shoved deep into the pocket of his jeans. Apparently he had been there a while…watching. I smiled at him, "Now that it's almost done. Sure."

He chuckled as he pushed himself off of the frame and strolled toward me. He gave me a swift kiss on the cheek, "Sorry…Sammy and I have a lead on a _creeper_ as you call it."

I nodded as I continued to put away dishes. I was still _grounded_ from going anywhere. Before long, I was sure that I would begin to forget how to hunt, "When do ya'll leave?"

He looked down at the soapy water that had grown cold a few minutes ago. I rolled my eyes, "Seriously? You're leaving that quick? Leaving me here with…you're crazy. She'll kill me."

"I know…that's why you're coming with me on this one," the sentence ended with him having a smirk on those amazing lips of his. I grinned and gave a girly squeal, not exactly hunterish of me, but I was excited. Finally, I was going to get out there and get my hunt on. He chuckled down at me as he moved closer to my lips. He let them graze gently across mine. "And it's a quick hunt…so I was thinking you could pack for a few extra days. Maybe we could swing by the beach. I know it's too cold to swim…but I know how much you wanted to go."

I closed the distance between us and kissed him thoroughly. Our lips moving together, I could taste the beer on his tongue as he deepened the kiss pulling me closer. I felt myself sigh against him as my body relaxed against his. My fingers ran over his abs and I felt him shiver. I smirked and I wondered how long it had been since he had been with anyone. It had been at least ten months for me…some quickie fling. I knew Dean wasn't the poster boy for abstinence.

"Good God," I pulled away quickly at the sound of Kendra's disgusted voice. She shook her head as she snaked around us on her way to the fridge and pulled out two beers. "If you're going to fuck…take it somewhere else. We eat in here. Geez Ava…show a little bit of class."

Dean's eyes widened a bit and I smirked, "Learned from the best."

She smiled and shook her head. I felt the wall between us break just a little, "You'll never be as good as me sweetie."

Dean gave a little cough as she walked out of the kitchen and I slapped him on the shoulder. I heard the door slam and curiosity got the best of me. I went to the window and watched her walk to the garage. Dean pressed himself tightly against my backside, "Are we spying?"

"I'm curious."

"Nosey." He kissed my neck and I moaned letting my eyes flutter. I elbowed, "Stop…I wanna see what she's doing."

"I think she has a thing for Sam. Which is perfect since Sammy has a thing for blondes."

I turned in his arms and gaped at him, "I don't think it's perfect. She…she has a reputation. Sam doesn't or at least not one that I know of. She likes variety…she switches partners a lot. She's more like…"

I stopped and tore my eyes away from his when I realized my mistake. He withdrew his arms, "Me. She's more like me."

I sighed and rubbed my forehead frustrated, "No…"

He shook his head, "I told you I'd try this. If I'm in a relationship…I'm in it."

He walked away leaving me leaning on the sink with _idiot _written boldly on my forehead. Bobby walked in, "It's like living with a bunch of five year olds."

I went back to my task of putting dishes away. Bobby pulled a beer from the fridge door and eased himself onto one of the kitchen chairs. He gave a tired sigh. I could feel him staring at me, "What?"

"We have any apple pie left?"

I reached into the fridge and set the pie dish on the table. Actually, I practically threw it at him. There looked to be two pieces left. I handed him a fork. Bobby raised his eyebrows at me, but I ignored them. I just couldn't help but think about Dean, "Dinner was good. Haven't had a Thanksgiving meal in a while."

I shook my head, "I shouldn't have said what I said."

He sighed through his bite of pie, "Tell him that."

My eyes shifted toward the stairs. I wondered if he was waiting for me to come and apologize or he just wanted to ignore me the rest of the night. I looked back down at Bobby and the pie, he was about to start in on the last piece. I suddenly jerked it away. "What the hell?"

"Please Bobby…" I gave him the saddest biggest teary eyed brown eyes I could muster. He growled and stood up with his drink, "I'm going to bed."

I gave him a kiss on the cheek before he could run away from me. He smirked and slowly shook his head. He pointed his finger at me and squinted his eyes before he walked away. I shifted my eyes back toward the stairs and bit my lip. Apology accompanied by pie and beer, yes…it might just work.

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I knocked softly using bottles of beer and waited kind of patiently. I examined my apology. A piece of apple pie with a fork stuck in the middle and of course, pie wouldn't be complete without beer. I rotated my neck from side to side to relieve tension. I didn't want to screw this up between Dean and myself. If Cas was telling the truth then this was it for me….for both of us. I would hate to know I was the one that caused us to miss out on our future because I opened my mouth…again.

He was taking forever, so I assumed there were a few possibilities to this scenario. Either he's asleep and would be pissed I showed up at his door. Or perhaps, he's awake- waiting for me. Hopefully it was the latter. The door cracked a bit to reveal a ruffled Dean in his briefs and no shirt. I kicked myself mentally and smiled politely, "Sorry. Didn't mean to wake you."

I started to walk away and he reached for me catching the bottom of my t-shirt. I turned toward him, his hair was messy, his chest was perfectly shaped, his black briefs didn't give away too much, but I had a pretty good idea what they were holding back. I looked simple compared to him in my grey v-neck t-shirt with black and teal polka dotted sleeping shorts that barely covered my butt. I wore them hoping that he would accept my apology easier. But now, I was thinking they made me seem easy because all he had to do was ask for me and I was so going there. I shifted and licked my lips, "I just came to offer my apology."

I smiled and gave this stupid awkward laugh as I held up the goodies I had brought. His face never once cracked a smile or ever a smirk. He stood solid, watching me closely. I swallowed nervously, "You know I didn't mean it Dean. I say things and don't think about them sometimes."

He sighed heavily as he leaned against the frame of the door and gave him chest a light scratch. He seemed to be contemplating what to say to me. "No…you're right. I'm not exactly…celibate."

I moved closer toward him and thrust the pie and beers toward him, "Preachin' to the choir Dean."

"I highly doubt that you're one of those women Ava." He took the plate of pie and beers from me and sat them somewhere to his right inside the room. Guess I wasn't getting my invitation inside any time soon.

"You'd be surprised. I mean I'm not a merry go-round…but I've…had my share."

He smirked and gave a light chuckle as his fingers rose to play with the hem of my shirt, "I think you're trying to impress me in some weird way."

He pulled my shirt toward him and I followed until I was flush with his almost naked body. The thought sent a wave of heat straight through me. Oh boy. I'm not that experienced…I lied. He caressed my cheek softly as his green eyes sparkled in the dim hallway lights, "Here all along I was trying to impress you."

My eyes slightly widened and I felt my heart beat faster. His lips grazed mine lightly and suddenly I felt dizzy. Dean drove me nuts. His lips moved over mine gently as his arms wrapped around my body. His hands snaked down my back and slid over my butt only to stop at the curve of my butt cheeks. He gave them a tight squeeze and I felt myself moan into this mouth. All I could think about was getting him into a bed. I pushed into him and we began to move into the bedroom. We both froze upon hearing someone clear their throat. I felt my cheeks burn red hot as I saw Sam standing awkwardly at the end of the hallway. I had forgotten that Kendra had taken over his room. He was sleeping in Dean's room.

"Sorry," he mumbled with a swift nod and turned around. Dean chuckled into my lips and grinned as he made his way down my neck slowly with a trail of kissing then back up to my ear where he sucked gently. I held back a moan remembering Sam at the end of the hall. Dean gave my cheeks another squeeze which earned a giggle from me, involuntary, of course.

"Pack for at least five days…or don't pack at all." He winked at me and I think mentally, I passed out. After the hunt we were on our own…by ourselves…no interruptions…no separate rooms. I shivered at the thought of being _alone_ with Dean for _days_. I could already feel the ache in my legs. I turned to head back down to my bedroom. He swatted me on the rear, "Leave bright and early."

I gave a bit of a squeal and laughed, "Night Dean."

Sam turned around then and he gave me an awkward smile. He nodded, "Going away for the weekend huh?"

I smiled as I crossed my arms, "Thanks for sitting this one out."

He chuckled and rubbed his neck absent mindedly. A nervous tick that he had, "He pretty much told me I was sitting this one out. Besides…gives me and Kendra time to get to know each other better. She's having a little bit of a tough time with losing her dad."

Instantly I felt like a hill, "I wish that she would let me in. We are so close…like sisters…and she…she blames me. I hate that."

"Whenever someone dies that's close to us…we usually find someone to blame. You agree?" He searched my face for the answer when he already knew it. I nodded swiftly and patted him on the chest.

"I'm glad she has someone to identify with. Just try to remind her that her cousin loves her and that I'm still here…if she needs me."

He tipped his head toward me in agreement before heading off to the bedroom. I watched him until he closed the bedroom door and I was left alone in the hallway. The lamp at the end of the hallway next to the window flickered. I felt a slight chill run through me. Suddenly I was tempted to beat on Dean and Sam's door. I heard the bulb pop and then the end of the hall went black. I swallowed.

"You're not in danger."

I spun around quickly and then rolled my eyes at the angel, "Can't you knock…like normal people Cas."

I stomped off to my bedroom and he followed me. He watched me as I threw the suitcase onto the bed and started pulled various clothes out of the closet. "Dean informed of your impending vacation."

I nodded, "Yeah….so?"

"You are becoming close."

I stopped packing and stared at him oddly. I closed my eyes, shook my head, and then opened them. I was trying to focus…Cas could be so…vague. "What are you getting at? I'm a little bit confused as to why you are here stating the obvious to me."

"It's important that you two remain close," he said before disappearing. I shook my head and stared at the door. He left me…again…just hanging here without the proper information. Seriously? I growled in frustration and went back to packing. I had a week with Dean, alone, and I wasn't about to let anyone or anything destroy it. This was my time to be happy and I intended to soak every bit of normality Dean and I were going to have or at least, try to have.

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Thanks for reading! Thanks for the reviews!

:-)


	10. Chapter 10

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I popped a few more cheeto's into my mouth and listened to Dean tell me about his kidnapping experience…by fairies. I had laughed when he first started telling me and then he gave me this look. I promised not to laugh anymore, so now I'm eating food, praying I don't suck one down my throat in a weak moment if I lost my composure.

"This was with…fake Sam?"

He made a face, "I don't like the term fake Sam. It was still Sammy."

I nodded, "The one that 'let' you turn into a vamp."

"I didn't turn," I raised an eyebrow at him. He sighed, "I was close. I have to admit…I was a badass mofo though. Could you dig the whole sexy vampire Dean me?"

"Before or after I killed you?"

"I couldn't be your Twilight guy?"

I snorted, "Real vampires don't glitter in the sun. Why are we even discussing this? Tell me something else."

He laughed and snatched the bag of cheeto's from me. "Hey!"

"Like what? I've pretty much told you my autobiography." The sound of him crunching cheeto's filled the air. I gazed out the window for a few seconds.

"What about Lisa and Ben?"

He snapped his head toward me then quickly back at the road, "How did you know their names?"

"You don't say anything about them. Sam tells me a lot. We talk you know."

He griped the steering wheel tighter and mumbled a few curse words followed by Sam's name, "You know there are reasons why I don't tell you everything."

"And there are reasons why you should."

He snorted as he shook his head setting the bag back down between us. He rubbed his forehead and sighed, "I thought…Ben was my son. So after…the big bang, I went back to him and…her. Sam made me promise to be happy. To try and be happy."

"Did you love her?"

"Ava…" He began with shaking his head.

"I used to be in love with someone."

He looked over at me and then back at the road. He pressed his lips together tightly. I knew he wanted to ask, but wouldn't. I remained quiet gazing outside the window. It was remarkably dreary today. The rain was a fine mist and there was a slight chill in the air. The sun was beginning to set now. The road had an uneasy shadow about it. I shivered and reached for my jacket from the back seat. Dean was comfortable wearing his t-shirt for now, I hardly even saw him without long sleeves or a jacket. I asked Sam about it one time and he mentioned something about a scar. The ominous scar was actually a handprint on his shoulder. He glanced once more at me, "Cold?"

He reached for the heater and I laid a hand on his extremely warm forearm, "Just chilly. I'll be fine."

He nodded swiftly and continued to avoid me. I bit my lip and began to move the items that separated us. This was supposed to our 'vacation' to get to know one another become closer. So, I was going to get closer. He raised an eyebrow as I shoved everything to the passenger seat and snuggled up against him. He smirked and wrapped his arm around me with a tight squeeze. He placed a soft kiss into my hair and I sighed contentedly in return. Perfect.

For a few minutes he remained smirking, watching the road carefully as the light shadows now were in full bloom. The sun was gone. We still had hours to go from our destination. The next town was about twenty miles away. I nudged him, "Let's stop for the night. We can finished driving in the morning."

He met my eyes and studied them for a moment, "Alright. Next town."

Letting out a soft sigh, I closed my eyes before snuggling back into the warm crook of his arm. Where were you years ago? He cleared his throat slightly, "He…he a hunter?"

My eyes drifted back open, "Yea, still is as far as I know."

He nodded. I shifted my eyes up and I could tell by the way his jaw tensed and his eyes squinted from stress, he was trying to figure out who this guy actually was. I had no clue if he had known him or not. In this business, you do tend to know quite a few hunters.

"His name is Nick…he's from New Mexico. He was a friend of our family. Parents had known him since he was a kid, he and Aaron got along really well. Suddenly, I grew up and he noticed me. For two years….we were together all the time. He followed us around when we moved. Everywhere I went, he was there. It was perfect…started talking about marriage and having a family."

Dean kept his eyes on the road, but his ears were trained on me. His body was stiff, he breathing sped up slightly, his knuckles were white against the black steering wheel, eyes were slightly clouded over with thought…oh yea, he was listening.

I continued, "Then he noticed Kendra had grown up too."

I snorted and shook my head. Dean scoffed, "He cheated on you with Kendra? Kendra did that to you? Unbelievable."

"I've never been exactly built like a freaking super model," I laughed, but sobered quickly. "I've never been much of anything to be honest. Kendra is…it for most guys. Trust me…if she ever gets her claws in you, you'll be done for too."

"I'm already done for Ava."

I met his eyes and he kissed me quickly before having to return his attention to the road. I felt a quick warmth spread through me. This man sitting beside me was incredible. He was more than anything I could ask for. I just hoped that the feeling was mutual between us. I understand though if the feeling wasn't as quite as deep for him. We hadn't known each other that long, but there was this whirlwind thing sweeping us into one another. I could feel it. A pull of some sort.

I reached up and kissed him gently on the neck. I couldn't help but smirk upon hearing him take in a shaky breath. I moved my lips just millimeters up and made contact with his ear and he moaned.

"How far is that town?" I whispered letting my hand snake over his thigh. The Impala lurched forward and I laughed with a slight giggle at the end.

He shook his head and huffed as we finally crossed the city limits sign. I could see the hotel lights beaming at us with open arms. I smirked at his discomfort and he chuckled, "You find this amusing?"

"Extremely," I mumbled as I pressed my hand higher on his thigh. He gave a heavy sigh before turning into the motel parking lot. I smiled because I knew payback would be divine.

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The door swung open and bags fell to the ground at our feet. I heard the door shut and lock, the room was dark and cool. The gentle hum of the air conditioner was the only thing I could hear over our breathless moans. My back hit the door to our room and I was off of my feet. My legs wrapped tightly around his waist, his excitement was pressing against me, I could feel him smiling against my lips. Warm hands found the hem of my shirt and within three seconds it was abandoned somewhere. He turned quickly spinning us around and trotted off to the middle of the room. My mouth was just below his ear when he suddenly tripped. I squealed as I landed on the bed, alone. I laughed loudly hearing the thump and crashing of something.

"Shit."

"Are you okay?" I giggled and searched for the lamp. He mumbled something just as I turned it on. The strap to my duffel was wrapped around his foot, there was a chair a few feet from him, the decorative vase with terrible looking fake mums was now shattered to pieces on the ground. He looked adorable at that second. He was mad as hell, ego obviously deflated, pride lost. I pressed my lips together trying to stop the laughter from bubbling up. He looked at me with accusing eyes. "I'm…I'm sorry. Do you need help?"

"Trying to be all freakin' romantic here and almost broke my damn neck," He stood up and shook the strap loose. "See…you do all of this."

I cocked my head curiously, "I'm sorry?"

He waved his hands around accentuating the mess he had made, "This…all of this. You are the cause of this. And that…what was that in the car with the flighty hands?"

I smirked at his crumbling demeanor. I curled my finger and gave the 'I beckon you to come here' look. I may not be extensively experienced, but I knew that trick, oh yes. He growled, "And then you do that…with the eyes and the lips…"

I crawled to the end of the bed and wrapped my fingers around his belt buckle pulling him to me. I could already see the bulge in his pants and I grinned up at him. "You give me that smile…that specific smile….like you're up to something."

"And what if I am?" I pulled his belt off in a few quick tugs and slid his jacket off of his shoulders. He swallowed and moved his mouth to mine quickly. He kissed me deeply and I felt my insides tighten from anticipation. He pulled away slightly, "It's usually me doing all of the cohersin'."

I unbuttoned his jeans slowly and laughed, "Then by all means….seduce me Dean."

He chuckled and kissed me again before leaning back against the bed. His lips moved to my neck and up to my ear and then to my lips. Fingers danced everywhere and it was as he had a million hands. My flighty hands were nothing compared to his expert fingers as he pulled off my jeans. His shoes were gone along with his jeans and shirt. I wasn't sure when we became fully naked, but his skin was absolute heaven against mine. I could see his handprint on his arm standing out boldly. I ran my hand over it delicately and pressed my lips to his shoulder. He became instantly somber and I was afraid I had done something wrong. He swallowed tightly, his voice was hoarse as he spoke, "I need to tell you something."

"Okay…" I mumbled letting my head rest against the blanket on the bed. His eyes were the color of seaweed just a moment ago and now they had a blue hue to them. I'm sure my plain brown eyes were boring.

"You…make me feel like….from the first moment I saw you passed out on the table...blood, gore and all- you did something. I've never…never felt this way. You asked me if I ever loved Lisa…"

I caressed his face urging him to continue. He turned his face into my palm and kissed my hand, "Yes…but not like this."

I gave a tiny smile and played with his hair. "I love you."

My eyes widened at his revelation and I knew that this was monumental. He never ever said the word love unless a dessert was in the same sentence. He grinned as he was suddenly free of the weight that the phrase carried. I laughed and kissed him on the lips. I nodded and grinned like a fool. As he moved down to kiss me again…the truth was…I loved him too.

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After sleeping all by my lonesome self for…well, a long time, you would think waking up with a warm body pressed against yours would startle you or be unnerving. But the truth is…I loved it. When I was Nick, he never stayed over- he always left directly after the 'act' in fear that my parents would kill him. Although, they weren't stupid, they knew what we were doing. So this was something completely new for me. The feeling of having large strong arms holding when I was sleeping, tucked away under warm blankets listening to the soft snore just behind my ear. I could feel my hair moving every time he exhaled peacefully. Yes, this was something that I knew that I would love. I opened my eyes slowly and found myself face to face with a faux black leather clock with bright green lighting. 10:17am. I gave a slight moan and knew that it was time to wake up. We had a case to investigate, my first in weeks and to be honest, I was looking forward to it.

I rubbed Dean's arm gently, relishing this moment, knowing I wouldn't be able to be held in this safe cocoon of warmth and safety until later, much later tonight. I bit my lip trying to decide whether or not to wake him, maybe I shouldn't. He probably needed his sleep. I rolled my eyes and gave my nose a scratch, my own wants (staying in his arms) were taking over our need to get a move on.

"You're thinking incredibly hard for this early in the morning."

I smiled at the roughness of his voice. He rolled over and pulled me with him. I propped my head up on his chest and stared up at him, memorizing every imperfection, stubble, wrinkle, scar, and line of his face. He opened an eye at me and then closed it quickly as his hand rubbed my back with feather like touches,

"Your skin is so soft."

"I go through lotion pretty fast."

He chuckled, "Smells like honey and vanilla, tastes like shit."

"That's what you get for licking me…all over." I patted him on the chest and planted a kiss just above his right nipple. He smiled brightly, eyes still closed, "Didn't hear much complaining when I was doing it."

He opened his eyes and glanced at the clock, "We need to get dressed, and get out of here…I'm starving."

I lay back down as he sat up, blankets pooling around his hips. I shivered and pulled blankets toward me, "Yep. We still have a few more hours to drive. What did you say this case was? Did you bring a file or something?"

He shifted a bit uncomfortably and let out a breath as he stood up, my vision was met with a bare assed Dean. I ignored my urge to jump him as he searched the motel room floor for his boxers, "About that…"

I sat up and rolled my eyes, "You forgot the research didn't you? I asked Sam if he gave you the file and all he said was, Dean has everything."

He slipped on his boxer briefs and put his hands on his hips as he faced me. He bit his lip and shook his head slowly as if trying to decide what to say. "Dean? What?"

"There isn't a case."

I raised my eyebrow and pulled the sheet up to cover my breasts, I wasn't having this conversation half naked. "What do you mean, 'there isn't a case'? You…_lied _to me?"

"Not lied…I just didn't give you _all_ the details. It's more of a consultation thing."

I shook my head and stood up abandoning the sheet and blankets, stalking off toward the bathroom naked. I heard him sigh behind me, "Bobby wouldn't let me take you on a real hunt because of this whole Gavin issue."

I didn't answer as I slammed the bathroom door behind me. I wasn't sure why I was so angry, but I think it could be the fact that they weren't letting me do my job. I was so excited about the fact that I could resume my duties as a hunter. I turned on the shower in hopes that it would drown out his persistent knocking.

"Ava…" I shook my head as I stepped into the almost scalding water and sighed loudly, "Go away Dean."

"Ava…come on, unlock the door."

I didn't answer that time. I leaned against the wall and let the water run over me soothingly. I hadn't realized how much I ached until I had started walking. Leaning my head back against the wall I wiped the water out of my eyes. The curtain flew back and I squeaked. Dean stood there with a disapproving look on his face, "Seriously…what, you think I can't pick a lock?"

I looked down in his hand, he had my wash bag. I tried to take it from him, but he held it back and pointed a finger at me. His eyes were turned into slits as he peered down at me heavily, "Listen, for just a few seconds…then if you're still pissed- I'll drive you straight back to Bobby's."

I crossed my arms and his gaze flickered to my breasts for about two seconds. He shook his head and took a breath, "I know how much you wanted to get out of there. 'K? I also know that it was the only way for Bobby to let me take you off somewhere…this whole going to the beach and giving you a mini vacation. I told him it was just a consulting job- which it is. And I just wanted…"

He closed his eyes and rubbed the bridge of his nose. I almost reached out for him, but held firm, fingernails digging into my skin. He gave a short sigh and dropped the bag onto the floor then climbed into the shower with me. My eyes widened as he pulled me flush against him, "I wanted to be alone with you without everyone watching us. I wanted you to be happy. I was trying to show you that I can be more than just a hunter. And...that I care about you. A lot."

My hands flew up to his face and I pulled him into a kiss. He pressed closer against me, if it was even possible, and I could feel his boxer briefs sticking to my legs. He was beginning to harden against me. I pulled away, "I just wanted things to be normal again…hunting is normal."

"I'm trying to get you normal babe. And this is the closest thing I could get right now."

I smiled, "Say it again."

He scrunched his eyebrows at me, "Babe?"

"I like it."

He smirked and mumbled, 'You got it babe.' Before he pressed me against the tiles of the shower wall. I moaned into his mouth and he began to slip and grumbled, "How in the hell do people do this in the shower?"

I giggled and ran my fingers into his hair, "That's usually when the guy just bends the girl over."

He raised his eyebrows and then fidgeted with his wet underwear. He chuckled and spun me around quickly cupping my breasts as he did. He sucked on my neck for a few seconds and then he placed his hand on my back urging me down. Bending over I placed my hands firmly on the shower wall. He eased a few fingers in at first just twisting them about a bit. "God Ava…"

"You're wasting time…" I stopped talking there. I stopped all thought, all movement when he shoved into me quickly. Moaning I shut my eyes and smiled at his chuckle. He began slowly moving a perfect easy rhythm. Our breathing echoed off the tiled walls as the water beat down on us. I turned the heat up a little bit and he murmured a curse word. The water was close to burning us now and the pain of it only seemed to make me fall over the edge. Dean picked up his pace and I could my feet slipping. He wrapped his arm around my waist and leaned down further placing his hand on the wall beside mine.

"Come on baby."

His voice was husky and I swallowed feeling him slow a bit. I shook my head, "Faster. Almost."

With that he shoved into me three more times and we both lost it. His arm tightened around my waist and I felt my legs turn to jello. He held me up as he slipped away. He spun me around quickly, hair plastered on my face and gave me a slow kiss. His hands ran down my butt cheeks and he gave them a gentle squeeze. I sighed happily into his lips as he smirked at the feel of me trembling against his body. "How about I wash your hair for you?"

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_Okay…I wasn't clear with what limits I could push the 'sex scenes'. So, I kept it pretty PG13-ish…maybe. I could do so much more with the sex…that's for sure. :o) Trust me, I have so many ideas for Dean. Hehe..._


	11. Chapter 11

_This chapter is a bit shorter than I would like...but I'm shooting for my normal length on the next chapter. _

:o)_ Enjoy._

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By the time we arrived in the Trenton, it was almost dark. My body ached, but my mind and heart (as cheesy as it sounds) was on cloud nine. I haven't felt this used and tired in a long, long time. And no, I'm saying that feeling was bad…trust me, it was no where around the definition of bad. Of course, Dean had been my first in a while and I have to admit, it took me a few times to get back into my _groove_. I even commented on the fact that I was rusty and Dean disagreed…repeatedly…especially when I was on top.

I smiled as I gazed out the window. I loved this weather, the dreariness of it…just an alternating pattern of mist and rain. It played hell on my hair, but I loved it. Something about this weather just eased my soul. I think it may have stemmed from my mom, she always loved this weather too and my dad thought she was nuts. I felt a warm hand circle mine as my thoughts were pulled back to the man sitting beside me. He brought my hand to his lips and kissed my knuckles softly. I let my eyes roam over his face in the dim lit car. This was man was a stone cold killer when it came to hunting and here he was treating me as if I'd break if he kissed my hand with just a fraction of any type of pressure. And then, it hit me…Cas was right all along, even if he was a bit of an ass about it…Dean was my one. A fear swarmed through me and I pushed it back as he glanced over at me quickly.

"Thinking awfully hard again…" He said letting my hand go as he turned into a funeral home. I gave a small laugh. If only he knew what I was thinking about. I wondered if he felt the same way. I suddenly wondered if Cas had the same conversation with him.

"Know me too well already huh?" _What if I lost him? Just like I had lost everyone else?_

He smirked and cut his eyes at me before running them over the old brick building, "If I didn't know you before- I sure do now."

I smacked his shoulder with the back of my hand before I eased out of the Impala. I was moving a bit slower than usual, but I had a good reason. I'm sure just resting tonight was what I needed, but I was pretty sure that wasn't going to happen. Dean watched me for a moment and then tried to hide his smirk, "Are you okay babe?"

I waved my hand at him, "Just been sitting for a while I guess."

He chuckled before heading to the back entrance of the building. I imagined myself chunking a rock at his head before I fell in step behind Dean. I let my eyes room over the older building. This guy was apparently an ex hunter or something and now he ran a funeral home. His way of staying in the business up to an extent…keeping his eyes peeled for weird cases. He had called Bobby with a weird one and Dean jumped at it. The door flew open and we were met by a short balding man with petite green glasses. They were the kind of modern glasses that you would find on twenty something year olds with nerd written across their forehead. He gave a short nod at Dean before his eyes ghosted over me than back to my _partner_, "Dean."

"Pete. This is Ava…she just joined the Winchester army," Dean said with pride as he wrapped his arm around me, to show dominance I'm sure. Pete gave a tight lipped smiled and threw nod behind him.

"It's back here." Pete led the way and I trailed behind Dean again as he strutted off in tow behind the short waddling man. He had to be at least sixty or so.

"It?" I chimed in. I peeked around Dean to look down the pale blue hallway. The lights were barely on, the halogen bulbs were humming as we paced underneath them. Talk about creepy especially when the wood floor creaked under our weight. Dean glanced back at me and I smiled gently. He turned his attention back to our tour guide and the smile fell off my face. This place was giving me the willies'.

Pete shook his head with a small shrug, "Not sure what to call it. Not anything I've ever seen before in my forty years. Of course, I've been out of the loop for the past ten. With all these new creatures popping up- thought maybe you'd know."

Dean made an inaudible grunt as we made our way down six steps. Since I had been with the Winchester's, I had seen Bobby answer his phone or phones more times than I could count. Dean had a few calls every now and then. Other hunters, although they didn't much care for the Winchester's, valued their opinion on some things. Pete held open one of the double doors that had **Morgue- Employee's** **Only **printed on the front. A sense of dread flowed through me. I absolutely hated morgues. I should have waited in the car. "My granddaughter is actually the one who found it…"

Dean chuckled a little bit before he caught himself and stopped abruptly. After that, Pete eyed Dean with scrutiny, "You remember Ginger, don't 'cha Dean?"

Dean swallowed as he inhaled slowly glancing over at me. I scrunched my eyebrows in confusion and moved them to Pete. I was thoroughly lost in this private conversation of sorts. He looked suddenly upset. Dean laughed uneasily, "Of course…how is Ginger nowadays."

Pete narrowed his eyes, "Just fine. Stay away."

My eyebrows shot up instantly and I cleared my throat awkwardly, "Um…so the…_it_ thing…."

Pete shifted his eyes to me and then back at Dean sending him another glare before turning toward the slotted coolers. "As I was saying, _Ginger_ found this one on the outskirts of town."

I cocked an eyebrow at Dean as Pete pulled the drawer out. Dean shook his head and mouthed later. I sighed and shoved my hands into the pockets of my jacket. The grumpy man pulled the sheet back and I felt my eyes widen involuntary. The…_it_…was human like, hairy, and was…blue. Dean gave an _uhhh, what the hell_. While I tilted my head closer to get a better look at the face. "Do you think its dead?"

"Beats the hell out of me," Pete said before lighting up a cigarette and I felt myself grow jealous. I hadn't had one in days. He must have noticed me eyeballing his smoke and he offered. Dean shook his head, "She quit. So…this thing was where exactly?"

I rolled my eyes…quit my ass. I reached for a glove and slapped it on. Nodding as I felt for a pulse, "No pulse. This thing is burning up."

"Tell me about it. It's been in the cooler since it got here…almost like it's feverish. I tried everything….silver, iron, spells, chants, holy water. Hell, even spoke to it in other languages…nothing. It's dead."

"Or in hibernation…" I added as ran my fingers over the coarse hair only to find it falling out. "Hmm…well."

"It's molting," Dean said with a disgusted town. I rolled my eyes, "Seriously? You have a problem with hairballs?"

I held it out to him and he backed away quickly, "I'm gonna…call Bobby."

With that he immediately left me alone with baldy. I gave a small, nice smile and discarded the hairball into the trash can. It was blue…never had I seen a creeper with blue skin. The only time I had seen something this hairy was when Aaron and I took on a werewolf in Cincinnati one time. I placed my hands on the table and stared down at the blue form that was slowly balding itself. The dark grey hair was patchy almost like it had the mange or something.

"Been with the Winchesters long have you?"

I glanced up at Pete then back down. Shaking my head I answered, "No…a few months or more."

Pete gave a grunt of some sort before he lit another cigarette up and pointed down at the thing, "Any ideas?"

I shook my head wondering where Dean was. I sighed as I looked down toward the cooler, "What's that? It's feet?"

"Huh," Pete moved around the door and mumbled something with his smoke hanging from his lips, "Yea, fuckin' big, huh?"

He pulled the sheet off of the entire body and I noticed water…like it was sweating. The feet were humungous and the body wasn't even that large to begin with. "Where on the outskirts of town was it at?"

Pete scratched his forehead thinking, "North side, heading to Mount Rainer. She stopped at the gas station and there it was…hanging out of the damn ice machine."

"Dean!" I think I had an idea what this was. I remembered another hunter telling me about it as a child.

He popped his head back in the room, phone pressed tightly against his ear. I gave a swift nod, "Ask Bobby what he knows about Yeti's."

Pete and Dean were both staring at me like I was nuts and I probably was. Dean stepped into the room and looked from me to the creature, "Like the Abominable Snowman?""

"No such thing," Pete said from behind me.

"Not here…the far east has reports of them. We have Big Foot in North America…" I opened it's eyes and they were a deep purple. I reached for it's mouth and lifted the gums gently- they were dull, blunt.

Pete chimed in, "Yea…those don't exist."

"They aren't supposed to exist…but they do. Obviously." I pointed down at the specimen. It was true that I was calling this a Yeti before actually having proof, but I was pretty sure. If you put the facts together and had an open mind….I'm sure you could believe it…within due time.

"Um, Bobby's gonna check…get back with us later. You sure?" Dean snapped his phone closed as I nodded and Pete sighed heavily.

"Pretty sure Dean," I peeled off the glove and tossed it in the trash. Pete was already covering up the creature. "Do you have anywhere colder to store it?"

He quirked an eyebrow and I sighed, "If you don't store it somewhere cooler. We aren't going to have anything left by morning. It's melting. If there is another one out there…we need to know everything about it."

Pete growled as he threw his cigarette on the concrete floor shaking his head, "Be back before seven in the morning. I have a funeral to hold at eight."

"Yes sir," I grabbed Dean's hand and led him out of the room. He looked a little frustrated to me. Just after we exited the Morgue, he pulled his hand from mine and crossed his arms definitely and didn't budge. "Seriously, you're going to play the five year old card?"

"I usually lead hunts and questions and…everything. 'Kay?"

I gave a shallow laugh and shook my head mumbling 'Unbelievable' as I headed back up the steps. He called out after me, "Hey. I know you used to do things on your own, but we use team work."

I turned around with a laugh and he skidded to a halt. I stood up on my tip toes and gave me a soft peck on the lips. His eyes glimmered in the low lit hallway and the corners of his mouth rose, "You're full of shit Dean and I mean that with all the love in my heart."

His laugh echoed down the hall as he slipped his hand in mine and pulled me toward the door.

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Our motel was just a few blocks walk from the library, so Dean (in his trustworthiness and a little bit of begging on my part) decided to drop me off at the library and I would promptly walk to the motel. With Dean, I was learning that pouty lips followed by shiny eyes would allow me to have my way. He shook his head and just drove off after making sure I had my phone…and gun. The two things that a hunter should never be without. Well, I could think of a few other things that you would need but at the moment those were the most important in my mind. Looking back I made sure he had turned the corner before I scrolled through my contacts and pressed Call.

I leaned on the brick wall of the library and watched a few high school or college students leave laughing. They were chatting aimlessly about angles. I smirked, oh to have no _real_ worries.

Suddenly the voice filled my ears without a greeting, "Ava, you okay?"

"Hey, yea...I'm fine. So…how are things going?" I fiddled with the hem of my jacket while I was listening to muffled sounds. I could hear him breathing and then a door shut. He finally sighed into the phone.

"It's so good to hear your voice Ava. I was wondering when you'd call…you just left without a goodbye. I tried to get a hold of you, but you wouldn't answer."

I sighed and looked in the direction Dean's car had gone, "Yea, I know. Kendra need my help."

"That was nine months ago. Are you coming home?" His voice sounded strange. I hadn't heard it so long. It was deep and gruff, but didn't compare to Dean's. I closed my eyes.

"We talked about this. I left a note…'member? It was over anyways," I gave a short laugh. "There wasn't a point in trying Nick."

"Are you at Singer's? I could come there…talk…"

"No," I interrupted quickly. I shook my head and continued, "There isn't a reason for you to come…at all."

He scoffed, "There's someone else…I get it. Why did you call again? To rub it in my face?"

I inhaled deeply, "I need your help with something actually…you remember that case your dad took when…I don't know…you were 15 or so? That giant human thing that melted?"

"Umm, that was in the Philippines. Hairy bastard if I remember correctly."

"Yes," I stood up straighter. He laughed at my excitement.

"After a Yeti, hmm? In the States?"

"Yep. You know me…always the weird ones…" I smiled. "Can you email me some info on it? Anything that you can remember would be great."

"I'll have to look through dad's things. Rachel is here right now…I don't want to do that in front of her."

I nodded and mumbled, 'yea'. Rachel is his sister, about my age. She was still not over their father's death. For once, a hunter had died naturally. A heart attack was a blessing for them. Any natural cause of death is a blessing for a hunter. Supernatural deaths were ten times more painful for the family…and themselves. "Of course. Well, you know my email."

"Sure. And you still remember my number…" I could almost hear him smiling. I shook my head and laughed. I could see him standing by the window, forehead against the window pane, letting his beard grow for the winter. I sighed realizing I did miss him, but more so for his company. Cheater or not…he was a good man. A good hunter and he was my best friend at one time. He gave an awkward chuckle, "Well, that's it then. He better take care of you whoever this bastard is."

"He does." I answered softly.

"I'd probably like him huh?" I didn't answer his question. I wasn't sure if he would or not. If they didn't know each other, maybe, perhaps in another life they would have been friends. Of course, in another life- I wouldn't be a hunter. "Okay then Ace. I'll shoot you an email later. Take care."

"You too." I hung up immediately and took a deep breath. At some point, I was going to have to tell Dean that I had left Nick about nine months ago and that it hadn't been years like I'm sure he thought it had been. That conversation was bound to suck ass. I opened the door to the library and entered. I had 30 minutes to do three hours of research. Lucky me.

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_Little announcement in case some of ya'll didn't know- I'm on Twitter. Follow me and I'll follow you- cause I'm cool like that. _

:o) _haha._

/_andrea_nicole


	12. Chapter 12

_I haven't done action sequences in so long...I think I'm rusty._

_:o) haha_

_Hope you enjoy!_

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Dean light snores filled the room along with the gentle click of my keyboard on the laptop that Sam let me borrow for the trip. I had put the television on mute not too long after he had fallen asleep. Rather than turning it off, I switched from the black and white western to the cooking channel. Every once in a while I would glance up and get entranced by the way the chef was cooking. I could go for some home cooking right now, but this motel room that we had spent next to nothing for…had nothing. Come to think of it, I think being a chef would be absolutely amazing. My own small restaurant or bistro in a smaller part of a city. Somewhere that I could blend into society easy. I shook my head, another life, and another time perhaps. I sighed before I snatched my reading glasses from my face. My eyes ached from shifting them back and forth from the computer, to the four books from the library, to my notepad…then the TV…and straight back to the computer.

Maybe I was over doing it. What was the point in all this research if the damned thing _was _dead? Dean hadn't said much as I researched from the table not five feet away from him. He mentioned salting and torching the thing when I walked into the room earlier, but of course, curious me wanted to know more. When thinking about it, I took my mother's point of view on things. Dean favored my dad and brother's view on things. Maybe that was why I fell into step so easily with the Winchester's. I felt a familiarity to this whole situation.

My eyes shifted over and I had to smile. Before the snoring, he was silently sprawled on the bed flipping through the channels slowly. He finally mumbled something about his favorite western and not even two minutes later he was snoozing. I glanced at the clock on the nightstand, 1:40am.

I started to stand up and the computer beeped at me. The instant messenger popped up.

_Henson: You still there?_

I frowned at the name as I slid my glasses back on my face and replied quickly.

_Ace: Thought you were just going to email my info._

_Henson: There's a problem. I was looking thru dad's research. Where do you have this thing stored?_

_Ace: I don't. There's a guy who is storing it in a funeral home in town._

_Henson: Good. Those coolers there aren't cold enough to lower the core temperature enough for it to wake up. By the description you told me, it's in hibernation mode. You can kill it without too much trouble before the damn thing wakes up._

_Ace: It's not being stored in a cooler…I told him to move it to somewhere colder…_

_Henson: It goes into a hibernation period when core temperature is too high. They sleep until colder weather sets in. I don't know where you found this thing, but given long enough it will regain consciousness and will be thoroughly pissed…and hungry._

_Ace: I didn't know. I thought it was going to melt completely so I had him store it in a colder area. I thought your dad said it just melted! I didn't know. I have to get over there asap._

_Henson: It began to melt or so he thought. Apparently they sweat bc its part of a cooling thing for their skin. But yea, he refroze it…it woke up- started killing half of the villagers. He had to set the thing on fire. It's in his journals. I can send you the info if you want. _

_Ace: No. I've got to go._

_Henson: I know. Be safe Ava._

_**Henson Logged Off**_

I tossed my reading glasses and shook the bed quickly, "Dean- wake up!"

He shot up quickly gasping, looking around the room wildly and I instantly felt bad for startling him, "What's wrong?"

"We need to go back to the funeral home. I made a huge mistake. The freaking thing is in hibernation and I told Pete to put it somewhere colder. God, if the thing wakes up…" I shoved my arms through my jacket and he shoved his feet into his boots. I shook my head and grabbed my gun shoving it in the back of my jeans. I slid my knife down into my boot. "I'm such an idiot. Should have just salted and burned like you said."

"Are you sure it's not dead?" He said as he grabbed his coat, gun, and keys. We were out the door, tv still on mute on the cooking channel. Some older woman chopping a whole chicken with a meat cleaver. A simple life. I wish. The motel door slammed behind me and we hurried to the Impala.

"Pretty damn sure. I trust my source of info." He nodded and peeled out of the parking lot.

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Five minutes later and three red stoplights we pulled into the funeral parking lot. I noticed it instantly; the side door was smashed to pieces. I swallowed dryly as we both eased out of the car, "We…we have to burn this thing to kill it."

Dean went to the back of the car and opened the trunk. He handed me a gas can and a lighter. We both whipped our heads to the woods. Tree branches sounded like they were being snapped into." Let's check the woods first."

"That could be an animal. We need to check the building first. You said Pete lives in there." I whispered harshly. He looked torn between the woods and the building. "I'll take the funeral home…you take the woods." I started to move toward the building and he grabbed my arm.

"Ava," he moaned…and it wasn't in pleasure. I stood firm and pulled my arm away from his. His face hardened and finally he nodded and grabbed the other gas can. "Fine. Don't burn the place down with yourself in there. Understood?"

"Yes sir." He gave me a swift kiss on the lips and sighed before he headed off into the woods to investigate the noise. I reached for my gun and marched toward the broken entrance. Gas can in one hand, gun in the other…and to be honest, I wasn't even sure the gun would help any. It sure did put my mind at ease…a little. The hallway was slightly wet and slippery. The overhead lights were flickering on and off. My eyes finally noticed after I was about fifteen feet in the claw marks that lined the hallway's brick wall. "Holy shit…great idea Ava. Go by yourself."

I reached the morgue door to find it smashed in, blood was dripping down the door frame slowly. Bullets were imbedded into the brick wall. Someone had shot something…or tried to at least. I peeked around the door frame only to find more blood. Examining tables were flipped over the door to the cooler where the thing was being held was ripped off the wall. I entered slowly, keeping my gun trained in front of me. I didn't really want to be ripped to shreds tonight or any other night, to be honest. The blood trail led behind one of the examining tables, my eyes widened as the young red head's eyes shifted toward me, "Oh my God."

I sat the gas can down and snatched the sheet that had been covering a cadaver and pressed it tightly against her chest. She winced sending more tears flowing down her face, "Pap?"

"We just got here…I haven't seen him," I looked around frantically for the monster. Her eyes shifted to the large walk in cooler. It was still closed. She coughed unexpectedly, an awful gurgling sound came from her throat.

"It's not out. I think that one may be dead…the other is huge….came….came looking for the…baby," she started gasping for air. "Pap…Pap led it to the…woods...away from me."

"Dean..." I said looking up at the door. I felt for my phone, it wasn't there. I shut my eyes, it was still in the Impala. _Fuck._ I should have gone with him_. Stupid, stupid, stupid._ She began coughing again and my attention went back to her. I was pushing back the thoughts of a mangled Dean lying in the woods in this same position she was in. My eyes drifted to the sheet, red gave an eerie contrast against white. I swallowed seeing my hands slowly blending in with the red. She wasn't going to make it. I swallowed tightly, "You'll be okay. Ginger right? Pete…your Pap…told me about you. I think he's very proud of you."

She smiled, but I'm sure she knew I was trying to make her feel better. Just a little comfort before the light at the end of tunnel. Hopefully she was headed somewhere nice.

"He said you were pretty…" she said reaching up giving a small tug on my wavy hair. Her blood was now on about three inches of my light brown hair. She sucked in a quick breath and I watched as her eyes began to dim. Her face was pale…her eyes were no longer a bright blue. I licked my lips and closed her eyelids slowly. I pulled the sheet up enough to cover her face. I stood up and took a deep breath. She said the thing was still in the freezer. I sniffed and unlocked the door slowly. Within seconds I was flying through the air with a roar echoing in my ears, my fall broken by something soft, _Ginger_. _Oh God_, I was going to be ripped to shreds just like her. _Why the fuck did I open the door?_ I moaned and rolled off of the body, I was sticky from landing on her. Blood was soaking through my clothes. God, was there this much blood before? I reached for gun, but found myself being pulled away.

"No!" I screamed out. I flipped myself over and my eyes met a patchy haired creature with purple eyes, blunt teeth were shining bright at me, clumsy hands were griping my boot. This wasn't your normal Yeti…this wasn't like the abominable snowman that was on Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer- this was a killer. A monster. I kicked at it while reaching, searching for anything to defend myself with. If Ginger was right, this _baby_, didn't have any sharp razors for finger nails yet. I was lucky for that. I kicked harder this time. "Let…me…go!"

My eyes widened as I rememebered my knife._ My boot…my knife._ I searched and my fingers found metal. I kept kicking furiously. I wrapped my fingers firmly on my knife and rose up enough to feel the cold breath from the monster coming out in pants. I shivered as I plunged my six inch blade into its neck as far as I could get it. I was shoved away with a swift backhand to my right arm and it sent me rolling. It was thrashing about and crying out in pain. I prayed that _momma_ wouldn't hear it and come running. I lifted myself to my hands and knees as I crawled to my gun. My shoulder throbbed and I grunted as the added weight on it. _Pull it together Ava._ If I took out the eyes, I could get away long enough to start the fire. Dean's words echoed in my brain, _'Don't burn the place down with yourself in there.'_

Everything was happening so fast…I heard the clank as it tossed the knife toward the wall. _I'm going to die._ The blood was dripping on the floor, the heavy footsteps stomping toward me_. I'm going to die_. My heart pounded in my ears, the growl was vibrating my insides. _I'm going to die_. My fingers wrapped around the butt of the gun and I turned to hastily slipping on blood. _I'm going to die. _The gun was in my hand and I was shoving myself backward as fast as I could while unloading the full clip into its head. I hit the brick wall with a hard thunk, shut my eyes, my gun fired three more times before I heard _click click click _of the trigger. I was almost afraid to open my eyes, if I was going to die, I didn't want to see it. My hands were shaking, my breath coming out in uneven heaves. The thing was against the far wall slowly sliding down with its mouth open, blood oozing out. Even in times of stress and with my eyes closed, apparently I was a crack shot. All but three of the bullets had met their mark. All head shots. Daddy had taught his little girl well.

I wiped away tears with the back of my hand. I was almost completely covered in blood. My hair was falling in my face in matted clumps. My breath caught and I let out a hiss when I tried to move my right arm. I groaned making myself get off the ground. My arm was dislocated, but the pain was bearable. Pure adrenalin was pumping through my veins making my head throb. I shook it off as best as I could. I still had a job to do. I needed to find Dean. I shoved my empty gun in the back of my jeans and stumbled to the gas can. The babe was twitching, I wasn't sure if it was going to heal or come back like a fucking zombie, so I decided to hurry. I shook gas out around the floor, over Ginger's body, and the giant killer smurf.

I walked out of the room making splashes here and there. I stopped at another hallway leading into the main area of the funeral home. I opened the door, removed the lid to the plastic container and laid it down on its side. I watched the liquid spread across the carpeting. Backing up I took my jack off and soaked it in gasoline. I swallowed as I looked back down the hallway and flicked the light on, "Rest in peace Ginger."

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I found myself sitting on the ground lying against the wheel of the Impala watching the place burn. I could feel the heat off the fire and actually, I was comfortable without a jacket. After setting the coat on fire, I watched the flames snake down the hall and through the office of the funeral home. My mind was set on finding Dean, but at the moment, my legs wouldn't move and I couldn't get my arm back into place. That's when I leaned against the car and suddenly slid down into a sitting position. Everything ached now. The adrenalin was wearing off and my muscles hurt, my head was about to explode, and my shoulder was making tears roll down my cheeks. _Just a few more minutes and I'll go. _

"Ava?" I rolled my head over to the direction of the woods. Dean stood there with a wide eyed Pete. His face mimicked those in a horror film. I felt sorry for him, he had just lost his granddaughter and now his business, his home. It was gone. I had to keep reminding myself that I didn't kill her…I just…whatever the hell I did. "Oh Jesus…Ava!"

Dean took off running toward me. I'm sure I looked like a sight to see, clothes and hair caked in blood. A cut on my forehead a few inches long, my cheek felt bruised, my hand griping my shoulder tightly. The closer he got the more I took him in. His clothes were rumpled, dirty with mud, there was cut on his forehead, his lip was swollen.

I smiled the best I could through my weariness as he kneeled beside me checking my body for wounds, "We have matching battle wounds."

He seemed to disregard my joke and kept searching, "Where…God, where is all this fucking blood coming from?"

"S'not mine," I mumbled diverting my eyes away from Pete's. Dean sighed before helping me up. "Arms dislocated and my head hurts, but I'm okay."

"I'm going after it," Pete growled.

I looked back around at Pete, "The only reason I was able to get away is because the young one wasn't as strong. You'll get yourself killed."

He turned to face me, cuts were scattered across his face, and his fancy glasses were gone. His blue eyes were dull and for a moment- he favored his granddaughter, "I have nothing else to live for."

I swallowed hard and Dean's grip tightened on my hand as he looked away. I knew and understood that feeling. Complete helplessness, shock, guilt, anger, and a want for revenge. I nodded, "We should leave before the cops get here."

Dean's eyes roamed back to the building that was half ablaze, "You want a ride Petey?"

"I'll be fine," he stalked off toward the side garage where the flames had yet to reach. I started to open my mouth to call out to him, but Dean stopped me.

"Let's go. We need to get you cleaned up."

"Can you…can…" I sighed softly and looked away toward the burning building. Dean smiled gently and rested his hand on my back.

"I'm glad you're okay Ava," I smiled softly up at him just before he shoved my shoulder back into place. I cried out and felt tears roll down my face. He kissed my nose and ushered me to the car.

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_Fair Warning- next chapter will be Dean POV._

_Don't want anyone to get confused. _

:o)

_Cheers._


	13. Chapter 13

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I watched Ava closely as she moved slowly from the Impala to the motel door. Her strength was gone, that smile that I wanted to see wasn't there right now. After spending enough time with her it was clear that she felt guilty about everything…all the time. There were occasions were I saw myself staring back me. I understood why Sam was trying to get me to open up all the damn time. Feelings, _fucking_ _feelings_ were the problem. The human condition of caring what happens to everyone and anything. Sometimes I wished for a switch so that I could flick everything off, then again I enjoyed my _human condition_ on occasion too. The human condition kept us separate from the monsters we hunted.

Ava paused with her hand on the door and turned her head to me slightly, "You coming?"

I was leaning on the side of the Impala, palms flat against the cool metal remembering how I used to love laying on the hood when I was a kid. _Home_. It was just a piece of home. My eyes roamed over the black hood then met her tired, beautiful brown eyes, "I'll be a sec. I wanna call Sam. Check in. I've talked to him in a day or so."

She gave a weakened laugh and I felt my chest ache. She knew I was lying or at least half lying. Her lips gave way to a smile, her red lips matching the color of the blood on her face. I prayed silently that it would never be her blood I'd see covering her body like that. "Don't stay out too late Winchester."

After a nod, she opened the door and limped her way inside. I let go of the breath that I had been holding with a sigh. Obviously, with me…she was bound to get hurt. This was supposed to be a fucking consultation not a hunt. I pulled out my cell and pressed Sam's speed dial. He picked up on the third ring, "'ello?"

"Sammy…"

"Gah…Dean…" I heard him shuffling and then what sounded like a woman's voice mumbling something. I just assumed it was Kendra, but I said nothing. "What's wrong? You know what time it is?"

"I never should have brought her here man." I said heavily into the speaker. Sam sighed and I heard a door close. His voice became louder.

"What the hell did you do now?"

I should have taken offense to that- for him to think I would do something intentionally. I bypassed the thought though, "That…thing….wasn't dead. Almost got her killed…I…she's hurt…not bad, but she…I never should have brought her out here. I should have left it all alone."

"Dean…" I could hear the concern in Sam's voice and that made my heart ache more. It wasn't my fault, I know, but I still felt so damn guilty about bringing her here. "Ava's a hunter. You think she doesn't know the dangers?"

"I need help tracking it. I don't want her out there. The thing we came here for its baby and the babe is dead…but now we are looking for the mom."

"What the hell is it?" I heard a door open once more and he was saying Kendra's name softly. He mumbled off speaker about packing.

"A yeti…God, if you can believe that…"

"Yeti?" Sam sounded like he didn't believe me, hell- I didn't believe me. The damn thing was huge, claws were about six inches long, and teeth razor sharp…this was something out of a horror movie.

"Wake Bobby up…see if he knows of an easier way to kill this thing. Fire seems to be the key. Call Cas…have him zap you two here. I can't wait long. Pete went after it alone."

He sighed, "Be there in a bit."

I snapped the phone shut and rubbed my tired eyes. Maybe I could get a few minutes of sleep, hopefully, before Sam and Kendra got here. I quietly entered the motel room and locked the door securely behind me. Ava was still in the shower and I gave a heavy sigh as I took my jacket off and tossed it onto the table. The computer came alive and my eyes drifted to it. The messenger was still up. _Henson?_ Who the hell was Henson? I shoved my jacket away from the mouse and moved to the button flashing **"You've Got Mail".** I clicked on it quickly and my eyes flew up to the bathroom door. The shower was still on, so I had time to _snoop_. I shifted my eyes to the new message in the inbox.

Nick Henson. _Nick…the hunter._

I felt my heart drop to my knees, was she still talking to him? I shifted my eyes to the bathroom door and swallowed hard. Shaking my head angrily I clicked on the email.

_Did you get this whole Yeti thing straightened out? Let me know that you're okay. Don't make me come and check you out myself. –smile-_

_Be careful Ace._

The shower shut off and I closed the computer quickly and shoved it under my jacket. _Shit. Shit._ I hadn't clicked off the email. She would know that I was snooping. _Trust, God, this word had no meaning. _Ava came out of the bathroom towel wrapped around her bruised body and another towel drying her hair. "Water feels amazing. I left you some hot water."

I didn't reply. She scrunched her eyebrows at me and tossed the towel from her hair onto the ugly beige colored carpet, "You okay Dean?"

"Fine." I watched her move closer and she dropped her towel. I couldn't help it- I let my eyes roam down her body. I swallowed dryly, "You probably need to put on something…Sam and Kendra are coming."

She stepped back quickly. Hurt flashed through her eyes and then suddenly they were hard. She shook her head, "As soon as your girl gets hurt- you call in reinforcements. God, it's like you think I can't take care of myself."

"Is that what you are? You sure?" I snapped out quickly. She spun around as she pulled on a pair of panties followed a pair of sweats cut off at the knee.

"What are you talking about? You are making no sense Dean…" She gingerly pulled her t-shirt over her head and I almost stepped forward to help her, but I held back.

"My girl? Are you really _mine_?"

I was met with wide doe colored eyes. She was shocked to say the least. Her hands went to her hips and a flinch ran over her face. "Of course. Why are you asking me this? You should know by now that I am yours…_all_ of me."

I snatched the jacket off the computer and held the Apple computer out to her and she stared at it as if it were some animal that was going to bite her. Her eyes flew from the computer up to my eyes. I felt my head tingle with anger, would she deny it? "Are you accusing me of something?"

I tossed the computer onto the bed, "You still seeing this guy?"

"Are you seriously accusing me of cheating?"

"You were in love with this guy, right? So, what am I? The rebound?"

She scoffed as she turned away shoving her bare feet in boots that still were covered with blood spatters. She grabbed her Nike hoodie and started shoving various things into the pockets. She just shook her head the whole time, "I can't believe you."

I grabbed her arm as she passed by me and jerked roughly as I tightened my grip and pulled her closer. She let out a small cry and I realized that I was tugging on her injured arm. Her eyes filled with tears as she whimpered. I started to open my mouth, but voice in the room cleared their throat. We both looked toward the door as three extra sets of eyes were watching us closely. Sam wore an extremely stern look on his face. I instantly let Ava go and stepped away. I sucked in a shaky breath_. I hadn't meant to hurt her._ Kendra and Ava stepped outside together and I looked away from Sam and Cas' glaring eyes.

"Dean…"

"Not now Sam."

"Dean."

"Cas, take Ava back to Bobby's."

Cas moved his eyes from me to Sam and then disappeared. Sam shook his head and started to get Ava's things together. I jerked the duffel bag away from his hands, "I can do that."

"Really? Cause I think obviously you've done enough."

"You don't understand."

The motel room door opened and Kendra slammed it. She stomped her way to me and gave me a shove, "Hey!"

"You are such an asshole! She left his ass nine months ago because he was cheating on her! Then you accuse her of the same thing?" She slapped me on the face before Sam could grab her, "You don't deserve her!"

"Kendra…Kendra…" Sam wrapped his arms around her and pulled her back. She was struggling to attack me again. Sam began whispering to her and I turned around masking the hot tears that were prickling my eyes. I bent down and continued to gather Ava's things. I swallowed a lump back down in my throat as I welcomed the sting of Kendra's slap on my face. I told Ava that I couldn't do this…that I wasn't good at these sorts of things. If only she had listened…

_You don't deserve her._

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We had been out in these woods for hours now looking for this _damn Yeti_, my back and head were beginning to ache. I left my bottle of Ibuprofen in the Impala back at the park entrance. It was just me and Dean hunting this thing down. I sent Kendra back with Ava and Cas. Maybe this event would give them time to talk and bond even it was under unfavorable circumstances. It wasn't like Kendra didn't want her cousin back. Kendra expressed that she would be more than happy to have her best friend back, she just didn't know how to take the things that she had said back. Now here I was trying to handle my stubborn big brother who could a lot of times be a dick more than he could be nice. That wasn't really how he was…he was a good guy. He just had…a few things he needed to work on.

My eyes drifted over to him and I sighed heavily, "Still playing the silent card?"

"I can't believe your chic slapped me," Dean said with a growl. He turned sharply on the trail that we mapped out and stopped suddenly. "How was I supposed to know? It's not like she told me."

"Maybe you should have asked instead of goin' in guns blazin'….as usual."

His shoulders tensed and he shook his head, "What was I supposed to believe Sam? I mean, she told me that she loved him since she was like fifteen. Then there's this message thing and an email? I can't just let that go."

I let out a frustrated grumble and set the gas can down with a hard thud. I was tired of walking around aimlessly, "Well, did it seem like she returned his feelings in these…messages?"

He didn't say anything. He looked away, shoulders sagging heavily. I ran my fingers through my hair, "Seriously man, you're gonna have to lighten…"

"Shh."

"Look I'm just..."

"Shhh!"

I froze at his persistent _shh's_ and listened carefully. Screams. Dean took off at a run, "Pete!"

I picked the gas can up and ran after him. The closer we got to the screams, the louder the roars were….the more agonizing the screams were. I skidded to a stop to see an 8 foot tall grey figure with six inch claws holding Pete against the ground, claws extended through him. Dean was trying to activate the flame thrower that Bobby had made for us. The creature turned its attention to Dean and I immediate opened the gas can and tossed it toward the monster.

"Hey! Over here! Hey!"

Dean threw me an exasperated gaze as he started beating on the tin contraption. I took out my gun and fired a few into its chest. Nothing. With every move the monster made, Pete followed…the claws were speared all the way through. Blood seemed to be gushing, he whined.

"Kill me…just do it."

"Sam! Move!" Dean shouted and I took aim ignoring him. I wasn't going to let the man suffer and I sure as hell wasn't going to let him burn to death. I squeezed the trigger and Pete's body went limp. "Sam!"

I hit the ground with a hard thud and searing pain in my left thigh. I laid on the ground for a moment watching the light shining through the trees over head. My ears rang loudly, my leg throbbed, the ground was shaking…wait, shaking? I lifted my head and felt the sound rush back into my ears upon seeing Dean blasting the monster with the flame. I reached for my hand gun and remembered what Ava had said. _The eyes…I just fired for the eyes._ I shoved myself up on my hands and knees as quickly as I could and then propped myself up against the tree. I aimed and shot twice into the left eye. The creature stumbled back just about the time Dean's flame thrower decided to shit out. The monster was in flames and I aimed once more, my vision shifted and I shook my head. _Focus Sam_. I pulled three more rounds into its eyes before the thing hit the ground with a tremendous thud. I hit the ground hard and moaned as Dean cinched his belt around my tightly. My vision swam and darkened. The last thing I heard was Dean's voice telling me to stay awake. I failed miserably.

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My heart sank when Dean ran into the kitchen covered with blood and started shoving things off the table. He yelled for the first aide kit and I didn't quite understand what was going on until Cas walked in carrying Sam. My heart stopped beating. He was pale, there was a trail of blood, Dean was shaking me, "Ava, get the first aide kit. I need you to do that."

"O..okay." I rushed off down the hallway almost knocking a blubbering Kendra down in the process. Bobby met me and shoved it in my arms before turning to get blankets. Our first aide kit was more like a toolbox filled with every kind of supply you could think of. Hurrying back down the hallway into the kitchen I saw Cas standing in the corner with his fists clenched, face grief stricken. "Dean…"

"Cut his jeans off. Bobby, kinda need you here." Dean spat out sharply. I tried not to think about Dean and my conversation earlier. I tried not to think about the tension that surrounded us. I just tried to concentrate on the fact that Sam was here on the table, in the kitchen, bleeding…to death.

Bobby shoved Cas out of the kitchen, "Get Kendra out of here."

I tossed the ruined jean material to the side, "We need to elevate this…get it above his head."

I grabbed the towel that Bobby had brought in and pressed it to the leg, "Why didn't Cas heal him?"

"He did. Half way. His healer juice ran out." Dean said as he bumped me out of the way. Dean was removing the towel and I could see the bleeding start to cease. It looked like he was almost done when he 'healer juice' ran out.

Bobby appeared by my side and handed Dean a bottle of whiskey. My eyes widened at the bottle. Sam was starting to come back to reality. He moaned and sucked in a hiss when he moved. I reached up and touched his face. His eyes were dancing around wildly. It was as if he didn't know where he was. "Sam? You with us?"

He didn't answer. His eyes were moving around the room, his fists were clenched tightly. He acted like he was struggling against something. I looked down at his left fist. Reaching over him I quickly pried it open and pressed down on his scar, hard. He gave a yelp, "Are you with me Sam?"

There was a swift recognition in his eyes and I gave him a soft smile. He told me about the issues that he was having sometimes with Lucifer and his 'hallucinations'. I took in a breath, "This is gonna hurt Sam. 'Kay?"

He grunted and I glanced back down at Dean and Bobby. They were cleaning the wound. It was along the left thigh, a gash about seven inches long. The area around the wound was extremely puffy. He needed a hospital, but I was aware that wasn't possible right now. Bobby's surgical glove covered hand was inside the gash feeling around for debris or anything left inside the thigh. I felt my stomach twist and I looked back at Sam who was trying desperately not to move. Tears silently rolling down his cheeks into his ears, eyes staring hard at the ceiling, his fists where gripped tightly on the sides of the table as he tried not to move. Dean and Bobby were concentrated on his thigh. I gripped his arm tightly, "Sam…tell me about college."

"What?" He ground out. I swallowed and smiled, "Yea…tell me something about it."

"I…uh…gah…um…I loved the classes." He didn't look at me. He just stared hard at the ceiling. I laughed at his answer.

"Of course you would. What else?"

"Y-y-you tell me."

I nodded, "I didn't to go to college…you should know that. I snuck into a class one time."

Sam's eyes flickered over to me and he gave a pained laugh before he squeezed his eyes shut. Bobby mumbled an apology and fell silent again. I let out a breath, "I…wanted so bad to be normal especially after my parents were killed. I snuck into this physics class and I didn't understand a damn word of it."

He grunted out a strained laugh, "I liked physics."

"Then you'll have to explain it to me sometime because it went straight over my head."

"Almost done," Dean's voice sound thick with emotion. I didn't dare look back at the wound. "About to start stitching. Sammy gonna need you to stay still. I'll get you a couple pain pills."

"Wha…what did you wanna be?" Sam's eyes were on mine and I smiled, without hesitation I answered, "This will probably sound stupid…but I wanted to be a pastry chef. I wanted to own my own bakery."

"You could still do that, you know…" he hissed and I looked back at the wound. Bobby apologized a few times. He was about four inches into his stitching. I turned my attention back to Sam and patted him on the chest.

"Nah…I think I like where I'm at." I glanced over at Dean who was watching me closely. I raised the corners of my mouth up into a tiny smile and then looked back down at Sam. "Yea…I like it just fine."

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_Sorry I've been MIA for so long. Hope ya'll are still with me. _

_Reviews are Love._

**:o)**


	14. Chapter 14

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After about two weeks of _rest and relaxation_ for Cas, he was able to heal Sam. There was a scar present unfortunately. Of course you had to remember, these were the Winchester's. Their whole entire body was covered in scars and battle wounds. I assume the leg ached because every once in a while I would see Sam rub his leg and wince. Kendra had barely left his side since the incident. She was pissed at Dean for making Cas _zap_ her away for a bit. Better him than me. Kendra and I were beginning to get along now, thank God. She wasn't someone that you wanted as an enemy. Although, I have to admit for two people being pissed at one another, they hunted well together. It kind of made me jealous in a way.

I was still on _house arrest_. Bobby hadn't come any further in his investigations into who Gavin was. Cas wasn't any help either. Every time we pressed on the issue he became extremely quiet and said that he knew nothing of him. Dean was even so desperate to contact a demon named Crowley…which led to him fidgeting around me and said that he didn't have a clue who this _Gavin_ was, but he would do Dean a favor and check on it. Two weeks later…nothing.

So, in turn, being stuck here at the house with Bobby and Sam while Kendra was out with my boyfriend was excruciating. Of course, if that was what he was even called…boyfriend. We hadn't discussed relationship status or what we should call the other in case we ever had the need to introduce ourselves. Maybe I was over thinking it, per usual. That's all that I had to do though, being stuck in this house with no way to leave…all you do is think. Think, think, think…and think.

I peeked over the book I was reading at Sam once again. He wasn't allowed to return to his job for another few days or as long as he was still limping. Sam had his nose buried deep in a book on occults. It had something to do with Dean and Kendra's case. I sighed mentally trying not to think of the two sharing a motel room. Sam looked up and I shifted my eyes down and turned the page slowly. I glanced back up and his eyes were glued to his book again. I bit my lip and looked up at him again. His fingers tapped the worn hard cover of the book, "You keep staring."

"I think you're seeing things." I said easily as I turned the page again. I was a fast fake speed reader, obviously. He snorted and shook his head.

"That's kind of a bad joke, don't cha' think?"

Right. He _did_ see things. _That was really smooth, Ava._ I rolled my eyes and mumbled an apology- he shook his head in response waving it off. Some days he minded talking about it…some days he didn't care.

It became quiet once more. I sighed and shut the book hard, "Can we just…I don't know go somewhere?"

"Where?" He said turning the page of his book. I shrugged aimlessly.

I stuttered, "Um…the store…a gas station…I don't care. Somewhere were other people are?"

He let a heavy breath go and shut the book he was holding, "That's the point of keeping you here Ava…no people."

"I need…necessities okay?" I said looking at the fireplace. After a few seconds of silence, Sam nodded understanding my code word.

"Bobby can get it…he's done it before…"

"No Sam. I need to go."

"Ava." He rubbed the bridge of his nose before running a hand through his hair. He looked older then and stressed…very stressed. "You know what we're up against, right? Wh-…I don't get it- you're not afraid?"

"I'm scared shitless okay? I just need…I need to go to town. If you aren't going to go with me- I'll go by myself."

I stared at him hard and he shook his head. He stood up and gingerly walked to the basement stairs. I smiled and jumped up. I grabbed my jacket, the money out of my backpack, and my keys. I was already halfway out the door when I heard Sam call to Bobby, "We are headed to town for supplies. You need anything?"

I didn't wait for Bobby's answer because I knew he would say no. I was out the door and about thirty feet away from my jeep when I came face to face with Cas. I skidded to a halt with a yelp and threw my head back with a sigh, "If you are going to just 'pop' up somewhere…can you announce yourself or somethin'? Jeez."

He was unapologetic and cocked his head to the side for about two seconds. He then straightened himself out when I heard the screen door slam and Sam yelling at Bobby that I would be fine. I turned slightly and Sam was shoving something into his wallet. He was mumbling something. My attention went back to Cas, "So…did you want something or….?"

"Dean sent me to check on you," he said as his eyes moved over my body and paused on my stomach. I pulled my jacket closer to my body and crossed my arms. His head gave a small twitch and then he looked back up at Sam, "How is your leg?"

Sam's eyebrows shot up surprised, "Um…yea, yea it's good. Thanks man."

"Dean inquired."

Sam chuckled as he looked down with a nod, "Of course he did."

"We should go." I pressed as Cas met my eyes again.

"I can give you the answer you seek."

"I'd rather you didn't and leave me alone," I said harshly hoping the Angel would get the message.

Sam cleared his throat, "Is this…something…that I should know?"

"You will." Cas said as he looked at Sam directly.

"What's going on?" Sam said quickly, the concern thick in his voice.

"Nothing." I said forcefully.

Cas looked back at me, "You aren't happy?"

"I'll let you know," I replied coldly.

"This is your future Ava. You must embrace it." He said stepping closer. I instantly stepped back bumping Sam's arm.

Sam shook his head, "What the hell is going on?"

"Nothing." I said harshly. Cas tilted his head and then looked directly at Sam. With calm eyes and an equally calm tone he said, "She's with child."

"With child?" Sam said, his eyebrows scrunched in confusion. His mouth was twisted and he was shaking his head. "With…." He stopped and his eyebrows shot up, his eyes widened. "You're pregnant? Ava….w-why didn't you say anything?"

I glared at Cas. He didn't seem fazed, "Because I wasn't sure…until now. That's why I wanted to run into town, but thank God, Cas is here to ruin everything for me."

"Have you…does Dean know? I mean did…did you tell him that you thought...," I looked at him and then shifted my eyes else where. I never mentioned anything because I didn't know how he'd react. Hell, I wasn't even reacting well to the news. I have been stomping around the house for two days in a mood. Bobby and Sam chalked it up to cabin fever.

"I haven't mentioned anything." I let out a breath and then remembered the asshole standing in front of me. I, then, pointed a finger at Cas, "If you say anything before I do- I will pull your angel wings off and shove them up your ass until you cough feathers."

"That's not…" Cas began. Sam interrupted, "Cas. Okay…just don't. Go back, tell Dean that we are fine. Cause we are right?"

I nodded at Sam quickly and then smiled at Cas, "We are wonderful. Don't say anything, understood?"

"It isn't my place." Thank the Lord we agreed on something. He disappeared suddenly.

Sam and I stood in silence for a few moments before he cleared his throat, "So, um…you still…."

"Yea, I need to get out of the house. Now I need vitamins. I don't know how to tell him. We didn't want this now. I mean we were careful…or at least I was because I'm on…"

"Whoah…whoah…no…" Sam waved me off and started walking toward the jeep. I trudged after him. He shook his head and turned slightly holding his hand out, "I'll drive."

"Seriously? I'm pregnant…no incompetent."

"Keys." I scowled at him and tossed them up into the air, he caught them- darn him, and headed toward the passenger door. I shook my head.

"You are just like Dean. Always gotta take charge."

"Well, we are brothers," Sam mumbled as he slid into the driver's seat and adjusted everything. He looked out of place in the jeep. Almost like a baby giraffe trying to ride a bicycle with training wheels. The jeep was started and we were on our way. The radio station was on some country channel playing in the background, I could barely make out the words in the song. "I, um…I didn't realize Dean wanted kids."

Sam was quiet as he spoke. His voice was soft, understanding…comforting in someway. Instead of yelling and screaming and demanding answers like I knew Bobby and Dean would, he was calm. I, then, wondered why I wasn't with Sam. We were more alike than Dean and I. I finally shrugged, "We discussed it…he does want kids or at least he told me he did. This is so quick though. Too soon."

"It will be okay…Dean doesn't walk away from anything."

I made a grunting noise as the word _mistake_ flooded through my brain. I wiped away a few tears and Sam was quick to speak, "Not that this isn't something that you both don't want. You both want it obviously- the timing just may have been off…but. I mean, you know, not like a mistake…or….something."

"Something," I said quietly and then turned up the radio louder. He grimaced. I'm sure at his choice of words and not the volume of the radio. That was the end of our conversation for the day.

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"_**Give the girl a prize." He picked up the knife that lay beside the TV as he neared me. It scrapped the wood making me wince. "I've been waiting forever for you to figure this out."**_

_**I picked up the bottle of holy water and threw it on him as I began reciting, "Exorcizamus te, omnis immundus spiritus omnis satanica potestas, omnis incursion…"**_

_**He laughed. He freaking laughed. He suddenly flicked his wrist again and this time I felt myself being thrown against the wall. I struggled to free myself, but froze when I felt the blade run over my chest down across my stomach, "This will be a lot of fun for me…since I have big brother watching."**_

_**He suddenly cocked his head and smiled evilly, "Aww…does someone have a bun in the oven?" He plunged the knife into my abdomen with a smile.**_

I sat up gasping for air, sweat rolling into my eyes. My heart was beating a million miles per hour. I whined as I felt my stomach churn, Dean had been for what seemed forever. I had talked to him just a hand full of times on the phone. They were apparently in it deep, his words- not mine. He wouldn't tell me where they were, but apparently in the week and half they've been gone he discovered that Kendra was an interesting girl. In fact he asked me, _'Did you know your little cuz was…so interesting. Definitely an interesting girl.' _I had been having morning sickness since he said that…day and night.

I threw back the covers and darted to the bathroom just in time to toss everything from dinner. I flushed the toilet and washed my hands, my mouth, and splashed cold water on my face. I felt like I was burning up. There was a dull ache where Gavin had _stabbed_ me in my dream. I shook my head as I dried off my face. "You're gonna kill me kid."

I heard a door slam downstairs and voices. Dean was back, I smiled as I made my way to the stairs. Lisa? Dean just said Lisa's name. I froze beside the stairs and then pressed my body against the wall. Why in the world would he be talking about Lisa?

"Dean…it's just a question." Sam. I peeked around the corner as Dean tossed his duffel onto the ground. He gave a heavy sigh and crossed his arms, "Kendra said you made a stop? You could have been home like two days ago. Seriously? Man, you're with Ava now. If you're going to…"

"Shhh," Dean said loudly and began to walk up the stairs, "I don't wanna talk about about this right now. I'm tired as hell, 'kay? I's just checkin' on them. That a freakin' crime now?"

"If you still have feelings for Lisa- you need to tell her Dean. You're just stringin' her along. So, it's either you tell her or I will. Do you?"

I paused in my retreat, waiting for an answer. I'm sure I would have gotten one if Kendra hadn't said my name.

"Ava? You okay? I thought I heard you puking?" She was still in her day clothes, so they hadn't been home long. I'm sure she was just depositing her things in Sam's room.

"You sick?" Dean said from behind me. His voice was suddenly concerned as he felt of my forehead, "You're burning up."

I pushed his hand away roughly, "I'm going to bed."

His eyes were startled and he didn't say anything. I shook my head feeling nauseous again, I was suddenly dizzy….oh boy. I reached out for the wall and stumbled, but my hand met the wall. Thank God.

"Ava?" I felt his hands touch my arms and I tried to jerk them away.

"Stay away from me." His hands were hesitant, but he pulled away. He looked torn, not knowing what to do. I made my way to the bathroom, one hand on the wall, one hand on my stomach. I was going to upchuck in the next few minutes, but I couldn't make my legs go faster. I felt an arm circle me practically picking me up off the floor.

"It's okay," Sam said softly. "I've got you."

He directed me into the bathroom and gave a nod to Kendra. She stepped forward to help me and Sam closed the door. I could hear Dean and Sam yelling at one another. My head was spinning. Heavy footsteps made their way downstairs and then I heard Bobby's voice. Dots…I was seeing dots.

"Kendra…" I started, but I couldn't seem to get my warning out. Whatever the hell it was I wanted to say. Right now…I couldn't remember.

"It's okay, I've got your hair…just puke it out. Jeez, did you eat something bad?" She rubbed my back gently. I shook my head. I sat back and leaned my head against the wall behind me listening to the guys yell it out. And then, I heard it, clear as day. Sam told everyone. He yelled it to the top of his lungs. I'm pretty sure the neighbors heard it.

The last thing I remembered seeing was Kendra's concerned eyes, her cool palms on my face asking me if I was alright.

Then black. No…I don't think I'm alright.

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Thanks for reading everyone!

Just a few more Chapters and this story is over.

Don't worry...Part 2 is on it's way.

:o)


	15. Chapter 15

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_**We pulled up in front of Mam and Pappie's house after the five hour drive. I was glad considering I had to 'piss like a race horse' or that's at least what Aaron always would say. Mom would usually point her long slender finger at him and remind him to watch his language in front of me. I would then roll my eyes and say, 'Mommm, I know what piss means. I'm not a baby.' After that Aaron and I would both be 'grounded'. If you could even ground a kid especially whenever you lived from motel to motel.**_

_**Aaron fumbled with his seatbelt muttering, 'Finally.'**_

_**Pappie was already out of the car making his way to the house. I laid my hand on Aaron's arm, "Why couldn't we stay with mom and dad?"**_

"_**Mom's sick Ava. You know that," he shoved the seatbelt off and started putting his books back into his backpack. I shook my head not understanding.**_

"_**But she's been sick before. I don't want to stay with them…they're…they're…"**_

_**Aaron sighed heavily, "I know Ava…I know. Just stick close to me. 'Kay?"**_

"I know you aren't asleep," Kendra said playfully. I opened my eyes to see her setting down glass of water. She sat down on the edge of the bed, her finger running over the quilt that I was snuggled warmly underneath, "You've been awake for a while…you sure had Dean fooled."

"I've been drifting in and out," I replied in my defense.

She snorted and laid a bag of saltines on the night stand, "I'm not sure if pregnant ladies can have anything for nausea, so I brought crackers."

I moaned and rolled over, "Don't say that."

"Crackers?"

"Pregnant Kendra."

"Yea, well, you are…or that's what Sam says…Sam and Cas." Her eyes were holding a silent judgment in them. I knew she was curious why Sam knew and the rest of them didn't- even Bobby.

"They're right. I…I had an idea and I wanted to get a test. Cas _flew_ in and ruined that experience for me. He just…told me. He didn't give me a chance to discover it myself. I wasn't even sure how I was going to tell Dean. I mean…I know he wants kids…but who knows if he wants them now or if he even wants them with me or Mary Lou Who down at the diner."

"You mean Margarie?" She looked confused by this. She shook her head and gave a small shudder, "She's like fifty. I don't think Dean is _that_ kinky."

I moaned a little and began to rub my stomach, "God…this is awful. How in the hell did my mom do this four times? Ain't no way."

There was a knock on the door. We both looked over at the entry way that held Dean. Kendra looked nervous suddenly and I felt sicker. She rubbed my hand and excused herself quietly. She squeezed past Dean, who was staring blankly at the floor. He stood silent, his hands shoved into his pockets, right shoulder pressed against the door jam. He swallowed loudly and licked his lips once, "Were you going to tell me?"

"Didn't really get the chance to Dean." I sat up slowly trying not to jar my stomach in any way. He pushed off the door frame and moved to the unoccupied chair that sat lonely beside the bed. He eased himself into it with a sigh and ran his hand over his face before he crossed his arms. "Yes, I was going to."

He nodded, "You…you said that you…"

I knew where this was going and I interrupted, "I'm on the pill. Yes. I'm religious about it. Swear."

He rubbed the bridge of his nose and I had to look away. Hot tears were prickling my eyes. He sighed once more and started to get up, but paused, "I have to go out again. Case came in. I'll be gone for a few days. You'll be okay?"

"Of course, pregnant…not dying."

"Right. Pregnant." He gnawed on his bottom lip nervously.

"Who's the lucky partner this time?"

"Flyin' solo on this one," he said looking down at his hands. "It's up North."

"You just came from North didn't you?"

"Unfinished business really," he nodded with a shrug. I nodded slowly trying to remain calm, keep my emotions in check. I forced a small smile and played with frayed piece of material on the quilt.

"Well, be careful out there by yourself."

He stared at me for a long time without saying anything. I held my smile for a while longer even though I could feel my lips beginning to quiver and I reached over then, breaking eye contact, and grabbed my crackers, "Kendra is a life saver…hopefully this works for me. I'm feeling kinda yucky."

He gave a small smile, "Yea…dad told me that I was hell on my mom when I was in the _hideaway_ as he called it. Guess it's only fitting, huh?"

"Guess so," I said with a laugh. I even ventured more, "Like father like son hmm?"

He blinked once and his eyes moved down to my stomach, "Son huh?"

"I have a feeling," I stared down at the cracker I was chopping on. My eyes flickered up to his and back down, "You know me and my feelings."

"Yea, you're like Columbo." He laughed genuinely then and moved forward in his seat. His face slowly fell and he then cleared his throat. Just like that…our moment was gone.

"Well, I guess I better skat."

"She's up North…isn't she?" The words flew from my mouth before I could retract them. His eyes connected with mine and I couldn't tear them away. They were shocked at first and suddenly became hardened. He stood up quickly and shook his head. He stomped toward the door and growled as he spun around.

"If you don't trust me- say it. I know…I know you heard me and Sam talking. And it's not like you have room to talk. You've been talking to _him_."

And here we were, back at this. I shook my head slowly and nibbled on a cracker. I asked for help on a case. The first time I've talked to him in months. I was going to try and remain calm. He was practically yelling at me, daggers were shooting from his eyes, and his fists were clenched tightly. He crossed his arms defensively, "You gonna say anything?"

I lifted my eyes to meet his and held them firm. I shrugged, "No. Because you are going to do what you want Dean and you probably won't believe me. No matter what I say. I trust you. And…I get it. She was a big part of your life. So…go. Be careful."

I sat the crackers back on the nightstand and snuggled back down into the bed. I stared at the wall. The silence drifted on for minutes. He shifted uncomfortably and he practically whispered, "I'm coming back Ava."

I nodded, but didn't say anything. I closed my eyes and let out a weary sigh, "Can you get the light for me, please?"

He didn't make another sound, no peep, no grunt, no sigh, nothing. I heard him flip the light off and shut the door quietly. He left. He left and I cried silently into my pillow. I didn't believe him…not one second. He left and he wasn't coming back.

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**_A few days later…._**

"Christmas is coming up soon," Kendra said nonchalantly. I snorted as I sat plates that were full of eggs and sausage down onto the table. Bobby was pouring himself a cup of coffee. Sam was already at the table shoveling food onto his plate.

"Soon? Soon as in like two days," I replied as I sat down in my seat with my orange juice. I popped my prenatal vitamin in my mouth and swallowed. Suddenly I had a plate full of food under my nose. Sam was handing me the plate he just fixed, "You want gravy or something?"

"No- that's yours. Eat." He said taking the empty plate and setting the full one down. "You need to eat more. You've just been bird pickin' around."

"Maybe because I'm not hungry Sam." I said with a slight hiss in my throat.

He glared at me and leaned closer, "Maybe the _baby_ is hungry…Ava."

Bobby shifted as he sat down in his chair. He sipped his coffee quietly and began to fill up his plate. He really hadn't said much since he heard I was pregnant. I think…I think he may have been a little disappointed…in me. I shook my head and shoved the plate away from me. Kendra sighed, "Seriously? Just both of you eat, okay. I'm tired of the bickering."

I looked over at Kendra and then let my eyes drift back to Sam. I shook my head, annoyed at the fact he was treating me like a five year old. Kendra continued her little speech about the holiday, "Anyways…Christmas is in _two_ days…and I thought that we could go shopping. Buy each other presents. I could buy a small Christmas tree. Nothing big…something like three foot tall."

I looked back down at the eggs…God they _smelled_ amazing. Bobby shrugged, "Guess I don't see a problem with it."

_That_ actually surprised me. Sam, of course, agreed with Kendra. Now, all eyes were on me. I shook my head as I shoved a spoon full of eggs into my mouth, "I'm not going to buy anything…so I don't expect anything."

Sam smirked, apparently happy that I was eating. Kendra practically dropped her fork. It clanged on the table, "Why? It's Christmas. We always do _something_ for Christmas. Besides this will give you a chance to get Dean a gift."

I stared down at my plate. The sound of his name made my heart ache, "Dean won't be here for Christmas."

I saw Kendra nod from the corner of my eye, "Okay then the day after…it really doesn't…"

"He's not coming back Kendra."

"Ava…," Sam said softly…too softly…too sympathetic.

"No, he left. Okay? He left to go see _them_. What does that tell you? Have any of you heard from him? Hmm? Has he tried to call? He's _gone_. And you know what? As soon as Monday comes- I am too."

With that I stood up and left the table. Tears poured down my eyes as I rushed up the stairs to our, my…_my_ room. I brushed them away quickly and dug my duffel bag out from under the bed. My clothes were already neatly folded in the drawers which made it easier to pack. I had some emergency cash tucked away in a safe deposit box in Nevada. It should be enough to get me a place or get me somewhere. I was shoveling clothes in as fast as I could when a knock came from the door. I jerked my head toward it, a piece of me wishing for Dean to be standing there.

_Sam._ "Thought you weren't leaving until Monday?"

"Yea, well that's tomorrow. I wanna leave early in the morning." I wiped my eyes once more as I began taking things down from the closet and folding them. I would probably need another duffel bag.

"Can I help with anything?" He said pushing himself off of the door frame. I shook my head, but he picked up a t-shirt and began folding it anyway. It was quiet between us as we packed my things slowly. "You know…Dean's coming back."

"Don't go there." I warned.

"He wouldn't just leave you. Sometimes…it takes a day or two for Dean to get his head on straight. Dean's like that." Sam said softly. His voice was level, calm, and gentle. Kendra was over compensating- trying to make me cheery. Bobby was…hell- Bobby had said probably about ten words. He was avoiding the conflict.

"Do you think he's still in love with her?" I asked quietly as I sat down on the edge of the bed. I stared out the window at the junkyard full of cars. I thought of the night we climbed on top of the roof. I thought of how he walked me through the junkyard and told me which cars he wanted to combine into a _super_ car.

He didn't answer for a long time and I finally sighed before standing up. I needed to finish packing so that way- I had no excuses when the morning came. His hand fell on mine and I stared up into his large hazel eyes, "He…loved her because she was someone who got him through a very tough time. The kid…he's like his own. He's in love with you. I know that."

"How?"

"He took you on vacation," he said simply. He continued folding shirts. I watched him for a moment and gave a short laugh. His eyes drifted up to mine and then back down, "Trust me…Dean's never gone on vacation. Granted it didn't turn out so well, but the point is- he tried."

I swallowed the lump in my throat and eased back down on the bed. Sam continued to fold my laundry and I just watched him. He was doing it not because he wanted to see me go, but because he wanted to see me stay. Sam was…changing. Kendra was changing him…he was growing up, settling down. Then of course, his hallucinations were changing him. Lately he had been even more jumpy. Since I squeezed his hand a few weeks ago he had been rubbing the scar here lately. Pressing on it during all hours of the day. I saw him squeeze his hand the other day when we went to the drugstore. I wonder what he saw.

"Soooo….you're saying I should try too."

His eyes flickered up to mine then back down as he sat the last pair of jeans in a pile. He gnawed on his lip for a moment and then nodded slowly, "Yea. I think you should try. Wait and try. See what happens. If it doesn't work- I'll pack you up myself and send you off with a chunk of cash and…tell you to call often."

I gave a small smirk and nodded, "I think Kendra is lucky to have you."

He smirked and took a few steps toward the door, but turned slightly, "Dean is lucky to have you…give him time to realize that."

I watched his retreating form until the doorway was completely empty. I blinked and shifted my eyes toward the duffel bag half full of clothes. I let my eyes drift to the window and smiled to myself. I'd probably miss this place if I left anyways.

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One more Chapter left and then Part 2 in All That Matters.

:o)

I'm excited- are ya'll?


	16. Chapter 16

**Last and Final Chapter**

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_**Christmas Day….**_

Waking up to the sound of laughter wasn't something I had done in…years. I think the last time I woke up to sound of laughter like this, on Christmas Day, was when I was fourteen. My parents were in the kitchen making pancakes in the shapes of snowmen. My dad, being the mischievous man he was, practically covered my mom in pancake mix and then started spraying her with the facet hose. I crept to the door just to watch the display. I was completely mesmerized by the love my parents had for one another. Did they fight? Yes, but their ability to make it up to the other person was astonishing to me. One kiss here. A hug there. A flower on the bed. A card attached to fridge. A new pair of earrings. A new box of 9MM shells. Watching them made me realize who I wanted to be in a relationship.

Laughter drifted upstairs again and I smiled instantly. Sam and Kendra were laughing…Bobby was even laughing. I felt my heart warm at the sound. My heart suddenly beat faster…another voice. I had waited two days, still no word from Dean. Sam was very adamant that I stay though because he knew his brother. He knew he wouldn't miss Christmas with Sam and Bobby- it wasn't in his nature. I'm pretty sure Sam left voicemails also. Possibly even Bobby.

We decided on getting one gift each person. This was our first Christmas as a _family_…a _new_ family. I took in a shaky breath. This was the first time Dean had seen me in days. What should I wear? My pajamas? Something nice?

"Hey chica…we are about to open presents…and you know who is here…." Kendra grinned brightly from the doorway. She was wearing a pair of pajama bottom Capri's and a Harvard t-shirt. I smirked at that fact, "Okay. Be down in a second."

She winked at me as she left. I rolled out of bed, pulled on a pair of my grey yoga pants and threw my hair in a messy bun. I checked to make sure I didn't have mascara running down my face or humungous pimples. I wanted to look decent…pretty. Kendra had let it slip that Lisa was a gorgeous woman and that terrified me. I had never been one to flaunt anything. I was actually a modest person…my personality was what got me through high school…seriously. I'm not an ugly woman. It may sound conceited, but I know I'm beautiful. Am I a hot, gorgeous, retired yoga instructor? Negative.

My bare feet patted down the hallway and I had to pause at the stairs. His duffel bag was sitting at the bottom along with four Christmas gift bags. Was he planning on staying or leaving? _Oh God…could I do this?_ I started to feel nauseous.

Kendra peeked around the entryway into the study, "You feeling okay? You look kinda pale."

I gave a nodded jerk before descending the stairs, "Just morning stuff."

She nodded with a sympathetic smile, "You want some water?"

"Milk, please."

I rounded the bottom of the stairs and paused at the study doors when I saw Dean sitting on the couch holding a cup of coffee. He was listening to something Bobby was saying…with a smile. His hair was more messy than usual and his face looked a bit gruffer than normal. He gave a chuckle and then his eyes shifted to me. His smile began to fade and he looked down at his coffee. I felt my stomach drop. Kendra was there unexpectedly with a glass of milk and I drank half of it in just a few gulps.

"Present time!" Kendra said happily. Sam rose up from his seat and offered it to me. I was going to refuse, but he was already making his way the empty seat by Dean. Kendra quickly handed out the presents and then took her place on the floor beside Sam's leg. The room felt uneven and I felt uncomfortable. Bobby pulled his chair over between Kendra and I in order to create this horseshoe look. That felt somewhat better. Although, I was sitting directly across from Dean who had yet to look at me. I rubbed my stomach a little bit and then I drew in a breath as I reached for the first present. _Be happy. _"So can any of these be regifted?"

Kendra laughed, "Everyone's except mine!"

Sam joined in as he started tearing into his first, "She'll like mine. Yours…ehh.."

She stuck her tongue out at him and earned chuckles from the rest of us. Bobby was finished with his first. Sam bought him a new ashtray.

"I don't smoke you idgit," he said with a laugh as he sat it down and picked up his next…from me.

Sam sat his new books that I had bought him at the antique store on Fables down on the floor. He gave me a wink…which Dean caught. His eyes flickered quickly from Sam to me and then down to his gift from Bobby. His face looked startled for a moment. I couldn't exactly see what it was.

"I figured…since I broke the other one and you do have the occasional cigar…."

Bobby waved him off. Kendra reached up and shoved Sam playfully, "You moron…I said I wanted a diamond."

We all looked at her as she held up a keychain with a huge diamond on the end. I smiled and looked back down at my present from Bobby. A hand mixer. I glanced at Bobby and he cleared his throat, "I know that you aren't supposed to get a woman kitchen stuff…but you kept saying you wanted cupcakes and you didn't want to mix the batter by hand….so there you are."

I grinned and blew him a kiss. He reddened and I felt my heart grow. He was so much like my dad. I wish they had met…they would have surely hated one another, but at the same time- been amazing friends. I tore open the next one and grinned. I let out a laugh and held the shirt up for all to see, "Kendra…you've out done yourself."

It was a blue shirt that had a picture of an oven…with a bun. I tried not to think about my dream that I had a few days ago. _Be happy Ava_. I caught Dean smiling as I stuffed the shirt in by my new mixer. Sam and Kendra were opening their next set of gifts. Sam had a new green beanie and Kendra got a green scarf.

"Aww...we match!"

Sam mumbled, "Thanks Bobby."

Bobby ended up with a bottle of cologne from Kendra and received a look. She laughed, "I saw you eyeballing the neighbor."

Dean suddenly burst into the conversation. His voice almost startled me, "No way…ain't no way Kendra."

"What? I told you that you needed some." Dean held up a set of red fuzzy dice that was made to hang from the review mirror. He shook his head. I tried not to laugh. I pressed my lips together and opened my next present. I swallowed thickly. "I thought you could use some light reading material."

I smiled up at Sam and looked back down at my book. _What to Expect When You're Expecting. _I nodded and made myself not cry. I wanted this book a week ago. I kept on saying I needed it. Sam listened. Dean received a thermos from Sam. Dark blue. He gave Sam a fist bump. Obviously, Sam had listened to Dean too. Kendra bought Sam a new wallet…although I'm not sure what was exactly in it because he closed the box rather quickly and gave Kendra a long kiss.

Kendra lit up upon opening my gift to her, "Thank God…now I can have a freakin' decent bath in this place."

"Bath salts…seriously? I could have made you happy with bath salts?" Sam said annoyed. Bobby opened his gift from me and was already digging into it. A whole bag of miniature Baby Ruths. He tossed one to me. Okay, so maybe I bought these for us.

I peeked over at Dean as I opened my candy bar. He was twirling my present to him in his hands. My stomach felt sick because of the nerves…not from the baby. I looked down at my hands. I wasn't even sure if he wanted to stay with me and I had bought him such a sentimental gift. A simple chain that held a dog tag at the end of it. One side had a bird with extended wings that matched my necklace perfectly. The other side…had our names engraved.

"So, you holdin' out on us Dean?" Kendra stated with a hint of sarcasm. That's right…we didn't get the presents that Dean had left in the foyer. I looked up just in time to see him adjust the necklace around his neck and drop the tag under his collar. His eyes flickered up mine. He nodded, "Just you Kendra."

Sam laughed and Kendra hit his leg. Bobby was on his 3rd Baby Ruth. It was almost time for breakfast….more like lunch. Dean was coming back from the hallway. He handed a bag to each of us a bag.

"This…this is my way of saying sorry. And Merry Christmas," he ended with a smirk. He crossed his arms and leaned against the desk, watching us. My eyes watched everyone else, too curious to open my own just yet.

At the same time Sam and Kendra pulled out key chains from their bags. They smiled at one another and then held them out. **Favorite** **Uncle**. **Favorite Aunt**. I watched Bobby pull out a baseball cap that said **Grandpa** on it. I felt my jaw slack a little bit and I looked up at Dean. He was staring at me with such intense eyes as if he were waiting for an answer.

I reached inside the small bag and pulled out a black onesie that said **Metallica** on the front. I sucked in a shaky breath. I laughed and felt tears stream down my cheeks. I wiped them away quickly and folded the material gently and placed it back into the bag.

Sam stood up pulling Kendra with her, "Let'ssss go fix something to eat before Bobby eats the whole bag of candy bars."

Dean glanced at the three retreating forms, his gaze then turned down to the floor. Sam winked at me as he shut the sliding doors…slightly. They probably intended on ease dropping. I licked my lips nervously, "Did you like your gift?"

He eased himself into Bobby's chair beside me and nodded. He pulled out the dog tag and smirked, "Why the bird?"

"Because…while you were on…sabbatical." He chuckled and shook his head. I shrugged, "I realized that you and I are pretty much the same. We are both…free spirit's."

His eyes met mine and he watched me for a moment and then handed me a box. My heart sped up slightly, but soon, I realized that this was the box that Bobby had bought. I opened and smirked. It was a silver lighter that had _**Dad**_ engraved on it, "I'm not going to say that I was excited when I first found out…but I'm not going to say that I wasn't excited."

I nodded at his comment as I handed the box back to him, "Can't say that I was either. But…I've had time to process and think about everything. I'm having this baby…"

"I'm not going anywhere Ava." Dean reached out and took my hand. His green eyes bored into mine willing me to trust him- willing me to believe him. I wasn't sure what had happened up North and I wasn't sure if I wanted to know. But right now, this right here…was real to me. I wasn't sure how long it was going to last, but as long as Dean would allow it…I'd love him…forever.

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**I don't think I'm going to continue this story anymore. I think the hype, how little it was, has pretty much burnt out. Maybe I'll write something else involving our guys later. But I think I'm just going to call this one quits.**

**Sorry ya'll! Thank you to all of the avid readers and reviewers. You guys are amazing.**


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